My Girlfriend Has A Mental Illness, But I Love Her So Much - What Should I Do?


8 Answers

Samuel Chiltern Profile
Samuel Chiltern answered
You haven't said what kind of mental illness your girlfriend suffers from. Do you think it might influence whether she is capable of deciding whether she wants to be with you?

Since you mention her mental health, it is presumably having an effect on your relationship, so this is an issue you will both have to address if you stay together.

I have no idea how severe her condition is, but if it's affecting your relationship, then I imagine it is serious.

If her mental illness is the only reason you're not sure about staying with her, then you need to understand that, with the right support, whatever condition she has can become manageable.

If you love her a lot, then you should stay with her, but only if you are prepared to support her through this.

If you stay together, she will need your help. She will need time to herself, and equally, sometimes she'll just need you to be there for her. You must resist the urge to judge her or blame her for her condition, as this will only end up making things worse.

You should approach the idea of getting professional help - she might find it easier to do this if you offer to have couple's counselling with her.

If she is in any doubt about whether she wants to be with you now, perhaps these doubts will be allayed once you've shown her how much you care about her, and how much you're prepared to do for her.

Hopefully, you will find that by working together to address these issues, you'll develop a close and loving bond.
mai Vang Profile
mai Vang answered
It's funny how you said she's got this mental illness and she can't make up her mind about you, and you mention you can't make up your mind about her either.

Well, why can't she make up her mind about you? Is it whether to stay with you, or leave you? Don't hurt yourself, take a seat and talk with her.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
In all honesty, if you really love her and she holds a special place in your heart and you would do anything for her, then the disorder has nothing to do with it. You hold her close to you no matter what the problem. ~Chris P.
suman kumar Profile
suman kumar answered
If you really love her, then mental illness is not a problem that can't be solved by giving her attention and loving her.
I say stay, as it is apparent that you cannot make up your mind either - hence a match made in heaven? No offence intended sweetie. Okay? ‚ô•Nassy
Jacquelyn Mathis Profile
Wow, you are a patient man if you want to keep her in your life, I know how old you are. Apparently she has left a relationship that was abusive! Not just her man, but others, please take care of her.
thanked the writer.
Anonymous commented
I have bipolar disorder. That makes me flighty, full of mood swings (sometimes violent sometimes just irratic most often severley depressed), indecisive, and give my attention to things a real run for the money.

I've been married to my husband now for 8 years, I couldn't tell you how many times I've nearly ruined our marriage (sometimes on pourpose). But he still loves me, hes still here. No matter what her illness might be, it will be a trial..each day will be starkly different from the last. You have to look inside yourself and make sure...really really sure that you can handle that type of relationship.

I am the walking chaos that keeps him on his toes, he says he wouldn't have it any other way. (and yes we've tried meds...they are too expensive to me to stay on but work very well. You might want to talk to her about her illness, and if shes ready to get treatment).
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
This mental girlfriend is me. I don't think I have a problem, but he does. He leaves me everyday to spend time with his friends while being addicted to this game Halo3. He pays no attention to me, he doesn't help with the housework and it is driving me crazy.

I don't think he loves me but I am trying my hardest to stick with him. He says he loves me and then he says "I don't know if I want to be with you" and has been doing it for a while now. I started to drift away, and he got mad. Please help me.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
The best thing you could do is love her. "Love" heals all wounds. You don't have to marry her.  Seesee

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