My Friend Only Speaks To Me When He Wants Something From Me. Is He A Real Friend?


6 Answers

Carolyn Jones Profile
Carolyn Jones answered
To be honest, by the sounds of it you have a 'user' for a friend. They pick and drop you whenever it suits them - even when it doesn't suit you. Of course what 'he wants' has an affect on the friendship. If its always to go to the cinema maybe he just doesn't know what else to do with you. If its for a lift then you may just be his private chauffeur. If its for sex, then he is probably just using your body.

Why not say to him that you never do anything together regularly or different. Why not ring him up out of the blue and suggest doing something different. Get to know each other in a different way and see if it affects your friendship.

If he continues to act in this way then stop going along with it! If you always give in it'll always happen. So put your foot down. If he kicks up about it, set him straight. If he doesn't realise then no he's not a great friend, and you're better off without him.
Mia Trahan Profile
Mia Trahan answered
No, he is not a real friend at all, your friend is using you. I have also met people who try and do me like that but I wont let it happen. That person is mooching off of you that's all.
Gillian Smith Profile
Gillian Smith answered
I wouldn't say he was a real friend.
People who use you when they want something aren't usually classed as real friends.
A real friend gives and takes and is there for you when ever you need them . A real friend is happy to do things for you and keeps in regular contact whether or not they need something other than friendship from you.
You would be sensible not to always be available for this person to contact and not to do things for them and then you will see if they are interested in having you as a so called friend if there's nothing in it for them. You'll probably find that they stop contacting you if you have nothing to offer them.
One sided relationships don't usually last for long but real friendships can last a life time.
people like this tend to drain other people for their own benefit and are not keen to reciprocate.
If you do like him as a friend it's up to you to alter the terms of the relationship.
You should be honest and tell him that the friendship should be a two way process and that you expect to hear from him other than when he wants something.
Do you keep in touch with him or do you only have any contact when he speaks to you? If so you aren't doing much to make it a more worthwhile friendship either.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I'm in a friendship just like this. After my father died my friend thought it best to cut me off because I was being to emotional for him. I realize everything in our relationship was about him and for his benefit. Now that he no longer needs me I never hear from him unless he needs something from me.

He did show me who he was in the beginning but I wouldn't listen to my instincts. Don't make the same mistake that I did. You wil only be hurt and discarded in the long run.
suman kumar Profile
suman kumar answered
A friend who talks when he is in need of a help, is not a real friend. Cut the relations with him it would be better for you.
miley Profile
miley answered
No way! Next time they do that take them aside and say why do you do that to me? Why do you always use me for something and then try figure it out you never know they mite even actually be a true friend after all!

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