I've split up from my girlfriend who is 8 months pregnant. When we split I called her some really nasty things and hurt her. I sent her loads of texts and e-mails and she got the police out on me on a harassment charge. What can I do to see her?


6 Answers

Lamora Le Strange Profile
It sounds like you had a bad split. But the fact that you called her names and she's pregnant wasn't the smartest thing to do.

I would suggest letting things settle for a little while before trying to establish contact again. She's probably still feeling very hurt. After some time, leave a message with a member of her family for her to say that you want to make amends and do the right thing by her, but when she feels that she is able to. I would leave it at that and see when she responds to you because of the harassment charge against you. Don't suffocate her too much, as this may provoke more action that you don't want.

The fact that she is pregnant means that her hormones are everywhere, so she's probably feeling very sensitive and very vulnerable.You may need to play a waiting game for a little bit and make some compromises, but I hope this helps in some way. X
thanked the writer.
bob wast
bob wast commented
Yes that is what every1 says dont contact but i have been emailing her trying to sort been civil the baby is due this week but she just ignores me .she as been emailng my sister about the baby so i sent her an email this morning saying its nice how she can tell other ppl but not and thats just her style .... Now she replyed to this 1 saying fine have it ur way i wont let any1 know ... So y does she ignore my civil emails but the second i say something wrong bang reply strait away ...
Albert Chang
Albert Chang commented
What was the point in bailing out on her in the first place? If you were growing apart slowly, how does that get you angry in any way? No offense, but if you're emailing her right after you split, then that does seem like harrassment.

Second, if she is connected with your baby, then bailing on her is the same thing as on the baby. Just tell her you're sorry, and wait for a week or so then ask small questions. Take it in baby steps, pardon the pun.
Forest Lone Profile
Forest Lone answered
First, you are about to be a father whether you want to be or not. Takes two to produce a child. It is 50% yours and 50% hers. She will be in your life for the next 18 years as you get to know your child and be a part of his life. Think about your father. You are now that...to your child. Like it or not, you have chosen who is the mother when you two got together. That outcome is always possibe no matter who you chose to be with. You may have been issue with her now, but you must grow up and realize she is entiltled to her opinion and ideas just as you are entitled to yours which every one is entitle to. What ever issue you have with her now, get over it because she will be in your life for the next 18 years and your child will hate you if you bad mouth the mother to the child. You two must meet with a neutral party and come to an agreement on how you will proceed in a mature cordial manner for the sake of your child despite the hurt you both have had due to the split. The issue in question now is it is not about you...and not about her...the issue in question now is the child. Let time pass, let the child be born, visit the child and make the child your priority in your life from this moment on despite if you have a relationship with her or not.
John Profile
John answered
Sounds like you have nothing to complain about.you bailed out on her,after getting exactly what you wanted... Now you don't want too handle it ,.you punked out big time.I think she should sue you for everything she can until the child is 26 and out of college. : ).that will teach you.blah blah blah means you get the idea.remember you asked.
thanked the writer.
View all 7 Comments
John commented
Everything possible means a father and mother husband and wife together/married setting a good example of what marriage really is through thick and thin/good and the bad for life. Otherwise your still playing at being a father/husband.
bob wast
bob wast commented
We are not married and she as 2 kids from other fathers so its not as simple as u say
John commented
Marriage is never simple.
Rath Keale Profile
Rath Keale answered

How can a grown man behave this way with a woman who is so close to her delivery time!  You should be cleaning her house, buying groceries, putting the bassinet and crib together and painting the baby's room.  You should be presenting all the ways you will support her and the baby.  Instead, you are throwing destructive temper tantrums and degrading her very existence.  What makes you think you deserve a place in her family?  If the baby bugs you by crying, are you going to scream and throw things?  Move away and send the right amount of money every month.

3 People thanked the writer.
Rath Keale
Rath Keale commented
This boy is not old enough, smart enough, or mature enough to make a positive contribution in the life of this woman and baby. I hope her family fills the void that this boy will leave.
Veronica Thompson Profile
Hey, After reading that the baby is due in a week I suggest you get the hospital info to where she's going to have the baby and make sure your there to see the baby being born and cut the cord etc... Sometimes facing that fear of how she might react in a time of emense joy (the baby's birthday) can overshadow the illogical emotions and help you'll to talk and make up calmly. But its going to take a lot of apologizing and patience. I highly recommend you not waiting till after the baby's born and missing that experience because you messed up. You have to forgive yourself before she can.... Good luck and Blessings. :)

Answer Question