Does The Father Have To Pay Child Support In An Unwanted Pregnancy ?

13 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Honestly you people are crazy... Everyone woman wanted  equal rights.. Now that they have it its like they think they rule the world... If two people chose to sleep together doesn't necessarily mean that they want kids together... Obviously they talked about it and decided for the best for both of them to get an abortion... But like he said SHE decided otherwise.. How is that his fault... I mean I can see if he wants to be in the child's life... But if not you can't force someone to be a father... And calling him a dead beat or a low life.. Or  step up and be a man... He did when the mistake was made... Why didn't she step up and be a woman an realize that having a baby with a man who doesn't want to be there is not the right answer.. And forcing him to do something that he isn't going to put his heart into isn't right in either case... Why do people seem to pity the mother in these cases... Making a baby is not one sided... And if it is it is done in a clinic with just sperm... So the choice should be 50/50 not 100/0 and whatever the woman decides is how it goes... Its been to far gone now... That's why you have so many people not paying the support in the first place... Cause the woman thinks that if she brings the baby in this world its going to change how the man feels... And its not.. People are stubborn in their own way.. And if they stressed they didn't want it... I think they shouldn't have to pay.. If that means giving up all parental rights then so be it... He didn't want the baby in the first place... And you know what.. If he happens to grow a conscience down the line and wants to see his kid... I also think he has to start paying the child support arrears and monthly right then an there before he can see the kid... But people don't think like that... I bet it would stop a lot of women from having baby's young or when there not ready.. And also have a lot of people off of welfare because they wont be able to rely on the system cause if they have that baby they already know what the outcome would be
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tara  mane
tara mane commented
I agree with your comments. It is ridiculous that women make these decisions 100%. Women should be forced to either place the baby up for adoption or forced to give up financial dependency of child support from the biological father if he doesn't want any part of it. If they were married it would be different. It was a 50/50 act so it should be a 50/50 decision. She doesn't want abortion...fine use adoption, or take full financial responsibility.
tara  mane Profile
tara mane answered
If they are not married he should not have to if he doesn't want the child.  She is not forced to get an abortion,  she can take advantage of open adoption when he rejects her and the pregnancy as unwanted.  The law needs to change.  It is a wicked unjust system.  Men are making a big mistake.  They should be forming advocacy groups to stop this insanity.  Everyone knows children do much better in a two parent home.  Everyone knows  there are thousands of couples wanting to adopt babies and there are none for them to adopt.  It is assinine to force two people to marry when she traps him with a pregnancy.  It is assinine to force him to pay child support when there are two other options available to the little witch...preferably adoption.
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Rachel Gale
Rachel Gale commented
SHe isn't forced to get an abortion because it is her body. And maybe SHE wants the baby. That happens. OPen adoptions aren't as 'open' as they seem. Maybe Dad changed his mind halfway through. Maybe it was a one-time thing and mom decided to step up and be the best mom she could be. Not wanting it anymore doesn't give you the right to ignore it. I wouldn't be able to give up a child I carried and labored for. Maybe he should have wrapped it, or, *gasp* not had sex at ALL. It takes two to tango
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I don't want anything to do with either the mother or the child. They have both made my life a living hell. I can't afford my own apartment and have to live other people and that is going to change soon and I may be living out of my car. You want me to step up and be a man, well, I had no choice in the matter. She thought she would trap me since I was in the military. She told me I was a father 1.5 months after he was born. It was only when she realized she couldn't raise it on her own she contacted me. Since then I have paid what I owed to the state in back child support but the interest is so high it has not gone down. She has been unemployed for a year and doesn't intend to get a job it would seem because she makes too much money from me and draws unemployment as well. At this point, I just don't care anymore. I've considered suicide over this because I have no life of my own. But I need to step up and be a man? You women are all the same.
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tara  mane
tara mane commented
You have been cheated by the system and the hypocrisy of women. I call it sperm theft, because with it they can control you forever. It is bs. I am very sorry for you. Women poke it in men's faces, lie about bc, and are total coniving witches to trap a man or his money. Someday the laws will change.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
If she decided to get pregnant without his consensus, then she should take the burden. The law is (at least in Colorado) only in favor of the mother because this way the state has a lesser burden. They act like they protect the mother, but if the mother makes a decision like this , then she should be responsible. If she is on the pill and without his knowing stops taking it in order to get pregnant - it's her child only. The law is wrong and needs to be corrected.
Ovidiu Catrina Profile
Ovidiu Catrina answered
What he should take responsibility for?!
Having sex? Well, I assume we all have sex but some might get unlucky and pregnancy might occur. Does that mean he has to be responsible for the bad luck?! It's like making the victim responsibility for his/her own prejudices. Either we all take responsibility for someone's bad luck and place that child for adoption at once or mother should be helped by the state as any other parents who need state support for raising their children
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered

I believe that if you married and or playing house that the man should pay child support,The majority of theses girls get pregnant to hold on to a guy she hasn't even know for 3 months and wants him to be all hers and that's the way so she thinks of getting him to stay with her. 

This needs to stop and congress should do something about this and make it retroactive . All these young guys are struggling while mama to be is at home collecting all the free stuff the state that they  will allow her to get. 

This makes me sick. Unless they both agree that they wanted a child together than  I say mama wanna be get up of bed and support your child, I also think if the guy wants to be a part of his life the child should not be denied that .  Might not have as many as unwed mamas in the country!

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Well if she refuses to name you as the father that can mean things but possibly 1 of the 2 reasons, 1) she doesn't want your money because I have seen women do this on many occasions to completely remove the father from their own or their child's life however these women do this when they are secured financially and emotionally but they have their reasons for doing so. 2) the child isn't the fathers which would give her no leg to stand on in court if she wants to file for child support but if the child is yours please do your best as a father to be there for them financially because a single mother is a full-time job and any money can help.
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tara  mane
tara mane commented
Stupid advice. He should not have to be a father if he doesn't want to. If she didn't want to she would abort the child. Hypocrite
leanne parish Profile
leanne parish answered
Ok does your girlfriend work or is she on benefits, the reason I ask is because if she claims benefits they will ask her for the details of the father, she has a few options here, she can lie and just say that she is unsure of who the father is, that way the csa will not be able to contact you anyway, if on the other hand she just decides not to tell them your details they may then stop part of her money because it is her chosing not to tell them,

I know you said the pregnancy is unwanted but why would you yourself not want to pay towards your own child, even if your relationship has ended surely you still want contact with your child.
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Anonymous
Anonymous commented
The fact is I never consented to having a child with this girl & we agreed that we had both made a mistake & that a termination was for the best . So in changing her mind & having this child she has taken the childs rights away of being brought up in a loving family unit (mother & father in a stable relationship) & my chance of having children with a partner I do do want to start a family with. The choice to give birth is completely down to my ex, I have no say in the matter ? I do understand that you probably won't see what I'm trying to say, most people think it's just another man trying to get out of his responsibilties ? All I can say is my ex has the choice of bringing a child into the world where it's parents never intended to have it but one of them liked the idea of motherhood so much that she would force me to give up my chance of fatherhood with a partner I would be comitted to having a child with ? Does my ex not deserve to be in a relationship where she & her partner choose to have a child rather than force me into a lifetime of regret ?

Sorry if that all seems like a bit of a rant , I am very grateful you took the time to answer my question, thank you for your advice .
Kendle McClurg Profile
Kendle McClurg answered
Each and everytime someone has unprotected sex they should expect pregnancy to occur. Even if the girl claims to be on birth control, or doesn't say she isn't still the man didn't ensure no pregnancy would occur by not using protection. Abortion is not a cure all for men who want to have risky sex with no consequences, it is a serious issue, that is only taken lightly by people who don't want to own up to their reponsibilites. It in no way should be up to the man to force a woman to have an abortion, he made his choice when he had sex with her without protection, instead of ensuring there would be no resulting pregnancy he left it up to her. Abortion is that taking of a human life, your childs life. So what if supprorting your child "makes your life a living hell" deal with it, and while you're at it GROW UP. So what if you hate the mother and the mother hates you, the child is completely innocent and deserves to be supported and loved. The conception was 50/50, after all the man was not raped he was a willing participant. How can a man accuse a woman of "tricking" him into getting her pregnant, does he not know how babies are made? Did he never hear about the birds and the bees? If a man does not want anything to do with his child then that child is better off without him, but he still has a legal financial obligation to this life he created. Before you go defending a man that does not even want to work hard to care for the child he caused to be born, ask yourself what kind of person doesn't want to support their own child. It's not a mature, loving, and responsible person, it is a selfish, immature, negligent person who concieves a child and then blames that child for their mistake.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
He consented when she got pregnant? They both consented to sex not children. Then if that's the case, abortion should be done away with. If a woman consented to having sex and got pregnant, then she made her choice and abortion isn't an option according to your thinking.
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tara  mane
tara mane commented
Amen. You are spot on with the logic. Men are being screwed and the law is causing it. The women exploit it.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Grow up, be a man and take responsibility for your actions.  You can't erase a child as if he or she is a video game.  What happens in your future is directly affected by the choices you make now.  Do you think that you are magically going to turn into a good father in a future relationship?  Being a man/father starts now when the pressure is on.  The trouble is that we can rationalize anything but sooner or later, we still pay a price for making the wrong choices.
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tara  mane
tara mane commented
You grow up and be fair. You cannot force an emotional attachment on someone who has been trapped. What is his wrong choice? Having sex with a lying female? Oh please....get with the real world. He is a man for stating he does not want her or the child. Being honest is being a man. He should have a choice if she does. You are judgmental and not ethical.
jim tully Profile
jim tully answered
You consented when you got her pregnant. That is what the courts will say and I agree. The court can order a paternity test if she asks for it. If it is yours, you will have to pay child support. The best thing for you is to be a father and a daddy to this child. It is a wonderful and scarry experience that you will NOT regret.
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jim tully
jim tully commented
This will NOT keep you from having a child with someone else. I have 5 daughters and my wife is step-mom to 3 of them. We have 1 together and i have 1 step-daughter. Both of us do NOT separate step-daughter from blood daughter. They are ALL our daughters.

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