Anonymous

My Boyfriend Cheated With His Ex-girlfriend - Should I Take Him Back?

25 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
No, do not take him back. He should of only got with you once he has no feelings for anyone else. I am in the similar situation. When I met my now ex, he claimed to be single but I recently found out that he had a gf of 2 years on and off always and that she was in prison for a few months FOR him and that she was pregnant when I first met him and he made her have an abortion when he met me!! She came out of prison last month and told me that because they have history and also a heroin habit that I didn't know about they always end up back together. He even had my name tattooed on him and when got found out he said he didn't want her and that he was only trying to be friendly because he felt sorry she went to prison for him...he was begging me back and even she said he didn't want her but I said no, walked away even though my heart was breaking and he has now gone back to her, he is back in prison and she is standing by him!! I still feel low but I know before all this I was a normal girl not involved in things like this. I feel like he chose her over me but the case was he lied from day one to attract and keep me and when the truth came out I wouldn't put up wi a man and lifestyle like that and she always has!! Men are very insecure and seem to need to at least end up with one girl so their not alone. I am still hurting now but I say don't walk RUN!! Show him your not a mug who will take him back and please have some self respect and let him and his ex do whatever they want, their both from the same breed cheating!! You will never trust him so why should you torture and hurt over something he did?? Just think if it was the other way around I bet he'd kick you to the curb in a second and not look back!! I still crave for my ex and get angry she's with him but I wouldn't want to look back in a few years and think god look how upset I was and what I put up with. It is hard as I still cry but I know I'm better than people that cheat. My final words...don't make someone a priority when they only make you an option!! Please remove yourself from this situation that they caused and hold your head up high no matter how much your hurting and one day you will wake up and the hurt will be gone :o) Hope this helps as I'm trying to go by my words too x
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I'm sorry for you....I know how you must feel.  I've been in the same situation before.

I say that if he cheated on you (with her) that, drunk or not, he has some unfinished business with her.  And, he's likely to do it again.

What did I do when my boyfriend did this to me?  Well, he's an ex-boyfriend now and I've moved forward.  I had no more respect for him after that.

He admits he still has feelings for her right?  Hmmmmm....do what you want, but I wouldn't take him back....and he will cheat again.  Once a cheater always a cheater.
thanked the writer.
Anonymous
Anonymous commented
I was in same boat like you. I started to dating with my boyfriend but he moved on other mexican girl and he lied to me that he broke up with her so I started to going out with him but he seems like a player and finally he cheated on me and he broke up with me on purpose. One and half later he asked me start over again he said he does not have a girlfriend I still had a feeling on him. He said he broke up with his ex girlfriend and he got tired of her. So we have been dating for ten months he said he loves me and we had sex all the time we spent time together and we went to florida for vacation and we were about to get an apartment but he was cheating on his ex girl with me and he lied to me for 10 months. He was still with her and he lied to her. That mexican girl found out everything because I told her and I dumped him he never changed he did not care how I feel and he just wanted to do whatever he wants. Now he does not want to messing with me because his girlfriend found out that low self esteem whore is still want to be with him and he wants her more than me so don't be a fool around jerk cheater they don't love
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Hell no. Being drunk is never a good enough excuse. Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Ok if you know he will not do it again then yes but if its been going on for about a month or more or even 2 weeks then its a no no and if he has done it before then don't buts it's really up to your love and his but I wouldn't if he has done it before and its going on for a long time but if just this once I would take him back but the next time he can find himself a new GIRL FRIEND
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Don't take him back, because they say if he doesn't come back to you it's the end of your love for each other and if you do take him back he will continue to cheat on you no matter what happens in your relationship, he will keep on having the same excuses.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Never trust ANYONE if they have cheated before. People change yes, but since they have done it once they are desensitized to the situation and are numb. When they cheat they don't feel anything.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
No. If he has feelings for another girl, then you don't want to be with him. You deserve to be with someone that only has eyes for you. As for having sex with someone else, drunk or not, he shouldn't have put himself in that situation to lose control like that. I think you should let this one go. There are other great guys out there that don't have that kind-of emotional baggage.
Rose P Profile
Rose P answered
It was a drunken mistake???

Unless HE IS ON THE WAGON AND NO LONGER DRINKING, I would dump him

once a cheater always a cheater

Michael Gregory Profile
Michael Gregory answered
Trust yourself and be good to you. If you really want to be with him then you have to treat history like history and today like today. You have to be true to you and he has to be true to himself.
Jil Blue Profile
Jil Blue answered
Easy, your question screams hurt....trust is broken. Tell yourself you deserve better and then find it.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Do not take him back.... Trust me I learnt the hard way... Respect yourself, respect your dignity, find someone who loves and respects you....
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Make sure you get the whole story. Ask the ex and then your boy friend. The answer is really up to you. You could make sure it doesn't happen again by watching him but then you look un trust worthy. If you break up with him it could have been an Accident. You see I am a guy. I still have feelings for my ex(s) But I will always love my girl more. What every you choose that you think is right is the right answer. Talk to him bout it again. See if he tried changing it. We try that a lot where we think you wont remember what we said and chang it.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I was in this same situation....be very careful and do not trust him yet...you need to find out if this is true somehow!...you may find out more was going on or it may go on again...been there!  some people do make mistakes and are sorry for them, I believe that...did you catch him or did he just tell you the truth?  that makes a difference right there...if they got caught, they are sorry they got caught and will tell the girlfriend whatever they think she wants to hear...it takes a good person to make a mistake and own up to it and do whatever it takes to make things right...but there is the other type of person who will tell you lies and do it again...follow him
John Bearfoot Profile
John Bearfoot answered
Its  not  worth  getting  hurt again  cause  if  it  happens once
most  likely  it  will  happen again  and  they say oh I am sorry
but  how many  times  can  one  person  forgive  their  partner
for  cheating  on  them
Arthur Wright Profile
Arthur Wright answered
You just answered your own question here. Once the trust is broken, its nearly impossible to regain and it takes a very special person to forgive and forget and majority relationships end in another incident so just best move on blaming him for this unless you want to give him a second chance but it wont be easy
Cynthia Orange Profile
Cynthia Orange answered
Our hearts is a complicated device. We find ourselves thinking and feeling one way but our hearts emotions does another. Trusting a person again you once trust is testy and you have to decide and be strong enough to accept the person back. Basically, follow your heart as well as think of your happiness. For it is not what he wants. What do you want.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Well I might say I'm sort of in this situation too. My fiancee has baby with someone else and recently she sent me a message explaining that when he goes to see the baby he cheats on me...I don't know who to believe..he   tells me that its not true and that she is crazy..and well that is true..at the begining of our relationship she did many crazy things to try and break us up...so who do I believe? Our wedding is in   3 weeks and I don't know what to do...
jessie cuellar Profile
jessie cuellar answered

Bite me once, shame on you, bite me twice, shame on me. It is always a possibility. Are you willing to take the risk for him?

Sylver Fox Profile
Sylver Fox answered
First of all: You don't trust him. Remember that even if you two would get back together, you can definitely expect him to cheat on you again. People don't usually just change, so be prepared.
Pixie Moore Profile
Pixie Moore answered
Try reading ‘I Hate His Ex’ by Alex Moore. I’ve just read it and it has really help me sort out loads of problems within my relationship. It is definitely worth a try!
Sanjeev Kumar Profile
Sanjeev Kumar answered
I think give him a chance to change himself, bcz may be that he want to realize his mistake.I think a girl can change a man if she want to change,
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I know I'm late but, ive been in this exact situation. I took my boyfriend back. After we talked I really believed that he wouldnt do it again. Once a cheater, always a cheater?? Not necessarily. Some guys learn their lesson the first time and know what they have and that they don't want to lose it. We are all human and we all make mistakes. We are still together and things couldnt be better. But bein drunk is not an excuse, AT ALL!!
thanked the writer.
Anonymous
Anonymous commented
This happened to me...but i was the girl he was seeing on the side (didnt know about the girlfriend)...he lied to me ....anyhow he got caught and the girlfriend took him back...what she doesnt know is that he has been calling me and wants to see me...so i saw him just to see if he would do it again...no problem we had sex and he is calling...it hurts and i love him because i was his girlfriend before her....i thought he wanted to slowly get back...she never found out so do not be so trusting...
jossy andre
jossy andre commented
Well what happened to me is I was dating a guy for almost two years. Then I found out his ex girlfriend moved back to our town and started talking to him. She was a really bad influence on him and was ruining such a good relationship that we had. I didn't know what to do and I had tried a few spells in the past from psychics, but none worked to bring him back. When I finally tried from voodoo master the other girl got out of the picture and he came back to me within a week. There are definitely
David Mathley Profile
David Mathley answered
If he treated on you once there is a 99% chance he wil do it again. If I was in your shoes I would tell him "No Way".
Dee Dee Profile
Dee Dee answered
I am in the same situation right now my boyfriend just cheated with his ex. I was on the phone with her and we were both trying to get him to admit what he wanted. Well in the end he chose me over her.....but she is still saying he is trying to contact her and he wants to be with her, but she no longer wants to be with him and has a new man. He has been friends with her for 14 years and he just ended that relationship to be with me???? He told her he broke up with me talked about me to her how unhappy he was with me and had me move out because we were not working, when I was the one who asked him if he wanted me to move out for other reasons he told me. She then told a friend of mine he was still trying to contact her through messaging on facebook and text messaging since it happened. She keeps saying he always comes back to her no matter what, he told his parents that he wants it to make it work with her this time and everything and then she found out he lied to her and was still dating me. I gave him an ultimatum her or me, he chose me that night that I caught him, and he stopped talking to her that night also but she kept saying he was continuing to message her when his phone was off and I was on the house line with him. But I still can't trust him. He has been trying to prove to me that he really wants to be with me. He wants me to move back in with him. But I am not doing that because I already jeopordized myself for him once. It is his turn to prove that he wants to make it work.....so I understand taking him back...but I am being super cautious to believe anything either she or he says right now....I am feeling it out to see what he will do to prove his love for me and that he really wants to be with me. The only reason I caught him was because he was acting everyway a cheater would act, plus her facebook page since christmas stated she missed her baby she can't wait to see him and how she was on a "mini Vakay" that weekend and she did not want to leave.....so I was super suspicious and had a friend send her a message, the next thing I know she called me and we talked and told eachother what he told me what he told her. Then he stopped talking to her called me and apologized to me said I understand if you want to cheat on me or if you don't want to be with me anymore I am really sorry I love you I don't want to lose you I was drinking that night and there is history with me and her, he said he only loves her as a FRIEND. In the very beginning he told me that there was nothing to worry about with her that they tried several times in the past and it never worked and they were really good friends and then this happened..... Anyway I told him I don't trust him and it will be a long time before I do. Till then he has to prove it!!!! So we will see what happens.....Be cautious!

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