My Boyfriend Constantly Stares At Other Women, And I feel I Can't Trust Him Any More. Any Opinions On This Topic? 


5 Answers

Oscar De La Huerte Profile
It's not uncommon to hear women complain that their men have straying eyes. Some people put it down to nature, whilst others see it as a disrespectful breach of trust. My opinion is that it all depends on the context:

My boyfriend stares at other women! 

You're sitting at the bar, sipping on a gin and tonic. Your man is clutching a fancy European beer in his hands. You're both having a great evening: The music is right, the drinks are flowing.

You quickly pop a compact out of your bag to touch up your foundation and suddenly you catch a glimpse of your man eyeing up a tall blonde on the other end of the bar. How does this make you feel? Does it make you feel like you are:
  • Not pretty enough?
  • Not interesting enough?
  • Not sexy enough?
Well, one positive is that it's unlikely your partner will be thinking any of the above. For many men, the temptation to 'sneak a peek' is simply too overwhelming.

In my opinion, his next move is more important than anything he's done up till now. Once he notices that you've clocked him checking out another woman, how does he react? Does he:
A) Look away hurriedly, trying to act like it never happened. b) Keep gawking until you intervene.

If the answer is 'a' then the chances are he's got a weakness for pretty women, but he respects your feelings enough to know when he's crossed a line. If the answer is 'b' then I'm afraid it's bad news.

So should it bother me if my man looks at other girls?

Essentially, the answer is yes. A man shouldn't be checking out other women if it offends you, whether it's natural or not. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, then it's disrespectful.

It takes a confident woman to accept that it may happen, but being confident doesn't mean putting up with it. Let him know how you feel in a calm and understanding manner.

If he still can't keep his eyes 'on the ball', so to speak, then maybe it's time to consider more drastic action (by this, I mean breaking up, by the way).
Brad Gampper Profile
Brad Gampper answered
Yup! That is quite a manly (like it or not women have to live with it) habit. All men think grass is more delicious across the river. Some of us are smart enough to hide it from our wives. Some of us are a bit afraid of our wives or the people around us but the bottom line is we do think and fantasize other women. When a woman says, her husband is not "interested" in other women, she is keeping herself in darkness. Period.

Now comes the matter of trust. That approach (definitely a shameful one) definitely gives our wives a sense of insecurity.

I have worked that out with my wife. I tell her openly that a woman is beautiful (sexually attractive for me). However, that does not mean I am going to cheat on her. The reason is I know no other woman would allow me that much freedom. She is the only girl who tolerates so many unspeakable dark aspects of my lazy life that revolves around a laptop.

I know, there are women who might be sexually attractive but none will take care of my parents and my future children as my wife does. We married just one year ago. Within just one year, it was my wife who made me believe that I would never be a complete person without her. Now, I am addicted to that woman. I am incomplete without her.

I don't know how many suits I have in my possession. I don't know who washes my socks. I get everything ready made at home. I get a delicious meal with a lovely smile (there is great difference in the commercial smile of a waitress and a caring smile from your wife).

At home, I can feel she is taking care of me. She is always checking if I need something. After one year, my mind has become a slave to my wife. I don't know how to return her love and care. I can't even think of betraying her. May be there is some food for thought for you in my personal experience.
samual answers Profile
samual answers answered
Who cares if he stares at other women so long as you get the physical result of his fantasy?
Janey Profile
Janey answered
There's really nothing you can do - as the saying goes: Why would he try beer when he can have champagne at home?! Wandering eyes are okay in my opinion, as long as they don't run off with anybody else !

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