If your boyfriend (who you love) makes you really sad most of the time, and breaks your heart once in a while, should you stay with him and try to make it work out?

9 Answers

Carolyn Jones Profile
Carolyn Jones answered
I'm afraid if someone is making you sad most of the time, then you should let them go. Having a boyfriend is meant to make you happy, You are meant to enjoy your time together, when things get you down you work through it together, and if you are sad then the other person will want to make you happy.

I know it's very very hard to let go of someone you love, but in the long run if he keeps breaking your heart, he'll wear you down until there is nothing left of you. Be assertive, do the right thing for yourself and say that's enough. Move on. Take some time alone and remember what it feels like just to be happy.

When you are ready, you will meet someone who will change your life so dramatically you will never even think about leaving him. You don't deserve to be unhappy. It'll be better for both of you.
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Louise Uys
Louise Uys commented
Thanx for your answer it helps hearing what other people think. I must say i would love to meet you DeepBreath.
Saddaf K Profile
Saddaf K answered
I have seen lots of people in a similar relationships, and trust me, it never changes.

If he is so used to hurting you, he won't change. He'll keep doing it and you'll keep getting hurt. There's no need to try to make something work out when you know you are going to be miserable in it. Move on. It sounds like an abusive relationship to me. 
Signs Of An Abusive Relationship
Abuse can be physical, emotional, or sexual. Usually, the abused partner feels as if they can't leave (out of fear or devotion), or that they deserve to be treated in this way. 
If your boyfriend does any of the following, you should break up with him, immediately.
  • Controls your life, the way your dress up, your choice of friends, your opinions
  • Humiliates you, puts you down but tells you that he loves you
  • Threatens to harm you (or himself) if you leave the relationship
  • Twists the truth to make you feel you are to blame for everything. Even if it's his fault, he makes you feel its your fault. 
  • Demands to know where you are at all times 
  • Constantly becomes jealous or angry when you want to spend time with your friends 
If any of the above is true for your relationship, I would say don't seek the power to keep on loving him, and instead look for strength to get out of the relationship.

Let him go and know you are better off without him.

I hope you find a guy who truly cares for you and respects you, and I wish you all the best.
dunia annan Profile
dunia annan answered
When someone is in love, one should usually forgive, but there is a limit to the hurt that you receive. You have the right to maintain your dignity. It is better to leave the guy who is giving you heart-breaks than suffer every time. Make the beautiful life go on. We still have a lot to look forward for better life
Annie McManus Profile
Annie McManus answered
Definitely break up with him - he won't change.

Think about the benefits of leaving him:
  • No more broken hearts (after the initial pain, which will go)
  • No more sad days with him.
  • Freedom to get on with your life and stop worrying about the relationship
  • Instead you could be out with another guy who makes you feel happy and doesn't make you upset
  • There are more people in the world who you will like just like you liked him, who will actually treat you well.
Trisha Zimmerman Profile
He is useless. No, he will never, NEVER change. You don't love him; you love playing the martyr. I'd advise you to run!
karen medina Profile
karen medina answered
Try to talk to him and let him know how you feel. If he cares about you, then he will definitely open up and respond. Well, he should care about you, because he is still with you. Take care.
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Louise Uys
Louise Uys commented
The problem is he says I talk too much and he is tired of always listening to my problems. he says I have too many. But when it comes to having sex then all of a sudden i'm the best thing in his world and then he truly knows how to make me feel special. I think thats the only thing that keeps me from leaving him. But thanks for the advice all of you i think i must do something now this thing is tearing me apart.Love ya'll!!!
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I'd have to say dump him.  Even if he occasionally seems like a great guy, you could do so much better. 

You could have a guy that makes you laugh, and makes you feel like your on cloud nine.  Or you could feel sad a lot of the time and breaks your heart. 
What's the point in keeping him if he's just going to keep hurting you?  You deserve better than him, you deserve someone that will listen to you.  It'll be hard at first, but over time it'll be good in the end.
nick chesterton Profile
nick chesterton answered
From experience - and a lot of it - I know that the only answer is that you have to move on. 

I think, deep down, you know what you need to do, else you wouldn't be asking this question. This is a positive step, as (just like alcoholics) recognising the problem is the first step to recovery.
You are worth more than he can give you - relationships may require some work, and sacrifices - but should, on the whole, be happy!
A genuine broken heart is serious - I know, as I have become seriously ill in the past, over this - may sound funny, but it's true.
Do all you can to end the relationship and move on - if you don't, you are destined for misery that will last for the amount of time you are with him. Set a date, and stick to it — do it as soon as you can, but give yourself time to prepare what you'll say.
You will feel better, and find someone who treats you the way you treat them - good luck and hugs!
Jojo A. Profile
Jojo A. answered

OK so you love him, do you want someone who doesn't put you first, makes you sad, gets mad at you is mean to you and clearly shows you no signs of loving behaviour from your description? If your best friend told you that was the way her boyfriend treated her how would you advise her? Love is give and take mutually not you give, he takes! That's not love, so its only one sided. Love yourself more and see where your decisions take you.

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