When Is It Time To Give Up On Someone Who Will Not Help Him Or Her Self?.


8 Answers

Dorene Jones Profile
Dorene Jones answered
If it is someone you "LOVE," my answer is NEVER!  I say that because love is unconditional, and in my opinion, one should NEVER give up on someone they LOVE, "Unless, that PERSON is gaining at the Harm of you, or ASKS you to." Then you will be able to hold your head high saying you gave it that person your BEST! 
Sharon Profile
Sharon answered
That depends if a person is a close family member or acquaintance. Lots of people will continue doing wrong things because they know they have someone giving them a hike up the ladder. It is time to have a serious talk with this friend and love him enough to want to see him change his ways. This is to refuse to help unless it is life threatening. One of the greatest ways to love a person is to assist them to the right direction. You are also getting in trouble in a sense because helping is called assisting. If he needs food because he threw his money away foolishly, buy him food, but do not give him money. Even with these kinds of assistance, after the second time, it is time to show him how you are able to make ends meet. I know you did not specify this as the problem, so I guess what I am saying is, sometimes our help to others can produce disasters. You sound like a good friend, and later in life, he will remember the words of a friend and thank you.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
And, like I say...Its not giving up! Its getting rid of those who bring you down as well. Its being STRONG enough to realize that the situations he/she is putting you in or you putting yourself in is negative all around. Re evaluate your feelings and emotions along with the circumstances. Hopefully you will have the courage and strength to be there for the person, but not drag yourself somewhere you don't want to be.
Jacquelyn Mathis Profile
If you are repeatedly having to do this, and you don't feel appreciated for helping, then that is probably a good time to bow out, and see if this person makes any changes for him/her self. It is a hard thing to do, and I have had to do it a couple of times, but it is for the best sometimes to let them hit bottom for a while. It's called tough love, and sometimes it works. Hope this helps, good luck to you.
nettie Profile
nettie answered
I think standing by a person after years and there is no change you become a enabler and this is not only meant for drugs any dillema you are assisting a person with and it is like kicking a brick wall you have to let go at some point and watch you efforts to help kick in,just like rearing your children until they get out on their own it seems all your efforts are for nothing,but when they are on their own they have to call up that mother wit or the fatherly information that they have stored and act like they were not listening,but yes you have to let go at some point but the when is on you and it does not mean you think any less of that person....good luck
thanked the writer.
nettie commented
These people survive on your energy and tare you down if you don't let go,I've done it and it works,trust me...
andi XD Profile
andi XD answered
We there comes a point when you have you have to realize is this person helpable or is this person going to continue to go down the same road over and over again you cant help this person his whole life i would say give it a little bit of time  to change if you have given it time then you need to realize he cant be helped the way you want to help have you tried talking to him about this ? Hope this helps XD
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I gave up on my sister when she used me for every spare dime I had, now I only check on her kids and make sure they get what they need.
Sh Z Profile
Sh Z answered
Well some times when you just had enough and you don't want to do it no more stop. Let them no blutly that your not going to be there no more. As hard as it may be.

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