When People Hurt You: Do You Forgive And Forget? Or Do You Just Forgive But Don't Forget?


11 Answers

Lauren Usry Profile
Lauren Usry answered
That's a hard question. It all depends on the person and what they did. If you and your buddy got in a fight, you would eventually forgive them and then forget it ever happened. But sometimes it is hard to forget. It's very easy to hold a grudge against someone. For me, it's hard to forgive and forget because I am so sensitive and am used to being hurt. But sometimes you just have to go with what your heart tells you to do.
noel abiang Profile
noel abiang answered
Me I forgive but not forget... If I forget the how can I forgive...lol
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
There are things that have been done to me that yes were very hard to forgive, but I did and I can't say anyone really forgets completely but they can go resolve things even if they never trust that person again.... I guess it's more of like that inkling you get when you are like "hasn't this happened before" instead of remembering what that person did and you change what you were doing as to keep it from happening again if you can... Then again I was always one to think where I went wrong before I thought to blame anyone else for things and the hardest person to forgive is yourself...
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Wow, this is a difficult question for me. I've been stabbed in the back by friends too many times to count, and at first I forgave them and forgot all about it. But then those same friends turned around and did it all over again, only on a much larger scale. I never forgave them for that. I haven't spoken to them in over five years. I feel sort of bad about that until I think about how much they hurt me, and how they never regretted what they did. One of my worst qualities is that I am very good at holding grudges for a long time. That only makes it harder on me as well as them, though, but I can't force myself to reopen the wounds they left there. Most people I DO try to be considerate towards, in the interest that I do try to forgive them, even if I might not be able to forget. It takes a lot to get me to the point of holding a grudge, but when I do, chances are that it will always be there. Most people I am able to cooperate and coexist with, though.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I forgive but it's hard to forget ,but then I think God solves that problem as we get older either by teaching us that it serves no purpose to hold onto to things that happen in life except for life education(to make you wiser as you get older) or he gives us diminished capacity(a little dementia/senility) towards the end so we  remember nothing that happened during life. : )..in other words he lets you forget or removes it for you.: )..so you can enjoy life...what there is left of it here on earth...: )
Jacquelyn Mathis Profile
What a great question! For me unfortunately, that is an easy and sad answer. In order to cope with my husband, a survival technique I guess, I would forgive him quickly so that he would forget, but he really never did. I could do that easier, and he never let anything pass. I would get things thrown in my face all the time, that weren't even true! I have according to him slept with tons of men, and I never even knew that about me. I can't forgive that, now that I am divorcing him. In time, I mean a long time, I might be able to, but now, no, can't do that. I do with other situations can forgive and forget. Hope this is o.k.
Annie Devore Profile
Annie Devore answered
OOh That's A Tough One.. After Time, I Forgave My Ex But It Will Take Much Much Longer Later To Forget What He Did To Me.. I Guess Some People Are Just Wrong For You, And You Don't Realize This Until Much Later.. But If You Don't Forgive; It Eats At You. I Am Wary Of People More Now
randy mitchell Profile
randy mitchell answered
In general and unintentional,I will forgive.But as far as forgetting,only the insignificant ones,you know,nothing gained,nothing lost.But the ones that were detramental to me ,I'll never forget nor do I want to.It's kind of a built in security and its only by time that might cause my forgetfulness.
Stephen Antonelli Profile
I would forgive but not forget, unless it was something not worth remembering. I like to keep myself out of a position of having to forgive someone for the same wrong.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
My opinion is too extensive to get into. All here make some excellent points though.
emma loveees youuu xo Profile
Well, I always forgive...most of the time I forget. But it depends what the person does whether you should forget or not. Sometimes it would be harmful to yourself to forget, because then the person would just keep doing it over and over again.

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