Mould them according to your requirement. Here I would like to quote, "In life, there is a very rare chance that you will meet a person you fall in love with and who loves you in return. Once you have this, don't let it go. You may never get it again."
Don't launch an attack:
She got down from her car and came running in. I was sitting there waiting for her. I had been waiting for the last half an hour. She sat down in the chair opposite me and wanted to say something. I knew she wanted to apologise for coming late.
"Will you ever come in time? Why don't you have some time sense?" "So, your boss let you leave at last!" "Why your boss let you leave at last!" "Why are you still worKing in that stupid place?" "What great things are you 'doing there?" I did not launch an attack like that.
Pay an unexpected compliment:
Instead, I said, "Linda, the problem with you is...you look more beautiful each time I see you. What is the secret?"
Her expressions turned from worry to joy. Finally, she gave a nice ear-to-ear smile.
"You are so nice, Chilipi. I know you are simply pulling my leg. But still I love it." She continued, "I thought you are going to scold me for coming late." I "Scold you? No chance. I know about mid-day traffic...or may be you had a sudden meeting in the office?" "You are very understanding. I am so lucky," she said wholeheartedly.
We continue our sweet talk. You can be more romantic with such compliments.
Treat her as unique:
Give her all the love you can. Treat her as an individual with selfesteem. The way she does things, the way she talks, the way she smiles...all these make her different from others. You loved this different "her." Let her be what she is. Sometimes, she wants to know, "Chilipi, why do you love me so much?" "I love you because you are Linda, the only woman on this earth for me," her face glows.
A few words are enough. Be sincere. Let them come out of your heart. Tell her how special she is. Once she asked, "Don't you think I am a bit difficult sometimes? Please tell me how to change myself." I brushed her words aside, "No, Linda. I love you as, you are. If you behave differently, you will not be Linda. You will be somebody else.
Not my Linda." Treat her well. Tell her what she wants to hear. Give wholeheartedly. Like they say, "The more you give, the more you receive."
Give her sweet shocks:
Give her some lovely, sweet shocks. Enjoy her reaction. See how she loves those shocks and love you more in return. I ask her, "Linda, why do you confuse me so much?" "What did I do?" she is confused.
"Just now you removed your spectacles. I am confused. I don't know whether you are more beautiful with your specs on or without them." "You are impossible." Her expression says she loves every bit of it.
"Everything is perfect with you Linda, but there is one problem," I tease her. "What is that?" Linda was worried and anxious to know her problem.
"Your problem is that you don't believe me when I say you are a beautiful and wonderful girl," giving her a Chilipi smile.
She loved it but said, "I know I am not. You are simply saying that!" I don't leave it at that. "Look madam, do one thing. Today after you go home, look at yourself in the mirror. Don't simply look. Observe carefully - your hair, forehead, eyebrows, eyes everything. Every bit is so nice. You will love what you see. Tomorrow come and tell me what you see." You can be sure she will do it and love it too.
Use innovative adjectives:
Do not stick to the same adjectives all the time even though she doesn't mind. There are so many good ones.
The thesaurus in your computer will help you. Words like gorgeous, ravishing, stunning, etc. Can be sprinkled to good effect. Call her honey, angel, sweetheart,' sweety, etc. No limit for innovations.
My friend once called his girlfriend "Onida". She was baffled.
He explained: Neighbour's envy, owner's pride! Is there any girl who wouldn't love that?
Good words cost nothing:
My uncle used to say to my aunt, "Hurry, up! We are already late. I don't understand you, woman!" Without even looking at her after she had spent one hour dressing up, I used to compensate for that, "Aunty, I don't like to call you 'aunty'. You look so young and charming. You can't be more than 30!" Her face would glow with happiness.
A few nice words don't cost you anything. But they go a long way in making women happy. They deserve those words too!
Make her feel important:
When you want to take her to a new joint, don't say, "I like the food there. Let us go." Instead say, "You will love the food there!" Your words will show that you care for her likes and dislikes.
Give her equal opportunity to spend:
Most of the time our expenses even out. Food bills, movies, petrol. "I will pay for it!" She declares sometimes. Other times I pay. If one of us takes the initiative, we let it be that way. Equal sharing is always good, when both are earning.
Respect her job:
Understand her work environment. Each workplace is different. The bosses, colleagues, and the work itself are different. The work pressure is unique. When you meet, both of you should be relieved of all tensions. Arguments will add to the tensions.
Don't hurt her selfrespect. If your work is important to you, hers is to her. So, tell her that you understand the importance of her work. Assure her that a few minutes delay doesn't make any difference. The heaven won't fall. Next time she will try her best to arrive before you.
Make amends immediately:
Sometimes, you might hurt her feelings with something, you do or say. Once it happened with me. "You can't come? What great thing are you doing there?" I asked her on the phone. It was a slip of tongue. It happens. Nobody is perfect. She did not react.
At least, she did not show it. But I realised my mistake. I called her immediately and apologised. It is better to let go of your pride and ego for the sake of the one you love rather than to lose the loved one because of your pride and ego.
Be sensitive to her moods and problems:
It is true that you both meet to spend some nice time together. You wish to leave all your problems and worries behind you. But she may have some problems at home or in the office. You shouldn't I say, "For God's sake, don't bring your problems here and spoil my mood." Problems and mood can't be switched off and on as you wish. You are equal partners in both happiness and worries. Be sensitive to her problems. A few nice words might change her mood and make your evening perfect.
Don't try to encroach upon her space:
Let her have her space. Don't encroach on it even with good intentions. She may have some issues she may not want to share with you - issues related to her parents or siblings perhaps.
I say, "Linda, I don't want to force you to share everything with me. But if you wish to you are welcome. I am always with you."
Be a good listener:
Be a good listener. Let her speak about her problems. Show her that you are interested in them. Interrupt with a few comments. At the end, if you have some suggestions, it is wonderful. Even otherwise, half of her burden has been unloaded just by pouring everything out.
You can use these tips because you are married? The fact that you are married does not mean you don't have a girlfriend! What I mean is that a girlfriend is not a wife, but your wife can still be your girlfriend. She has not changed after marriage. You haven't either. She loves you the same way. You too.
Go ahead and use these tips and enjoy the fruits they bring you.