I'm Currently In An Unhappy Relationship, Although I've Already Told Him I Want To End It. But I Still Let Him Remain In My Life Because I Care, And The Sex Is Unbelievable, Any Advice? I Find It Very Difficult To Take Him Completely Out Of My Life.

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5 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I am currently also in the same situation. This is advice that I know I should follow for myself & do understand that its not easy to follow. My boyfriend & I have been together for 2 years & a half. He is my first love, & first real relationship. I feel like I can't let go because I've been with him for so long. He knows my past, & knows practically everything about me.. We constantly fight & argue about everything, we misunderstand each other a lot more.. The more this happens the more it leads to a daily routine. After every fight I always give in. As much as I tell myself I wont answer his calls, texts, etc. I still do. Now no matter what I say or do he wont listen or take me seriously anymore because he knows he can say or do whatever he wants & I'll come back. Now it's to a point that I am so unhappy & tell him constantly that I want to break this off.. Its so hard to not let go. I sometimes get scared because I am afraid there wont be anyone else out there for me .. & same time I guess I'm scared of CHANGE in general. I came to terms that isn't true. There is someone else out there for me, maybe I don't see it now but there will be a time a new person will come who will know how to treat me better. & I learned that change isn't a bad thing. It's good because you get to grow & learn from it. Which is why I believe that if you are unhappy.. Don't waste your time being with someone who makes you feel this way. Regardless of whose fault it is.. Or whatever the situation is if you don't feel good about this person then you should move on. It will never be easy letting go of someone you love & really care about. I always tell myself that I'd rather be unhappy alone then be with someone else who will make me feel this way. There is no reason you should be unhappy. Sex isn't everything in a relationship. You have to think beyond that. We only have one life to live & you shouldn't waste your time on someone that will hurt you. Just relax & think positive. You can't completely take a person you cared about out of your life.. But you can take out the negative that it has caused you. Which is by becoming strong & to live your life each day, everyday & if you start to worry about him.. Just remind yourself constantly what it is that is making you unhappy in your relationship & with him. Just remember why it is you didn't want to be in the relationship anymore. Its mind over matter. Go out, do things that make YOU feel good. Even start dating & meeting new guys again. Worry about yourself only. In time things will become easier & you will be happy, only if YOU let yourself to be happy again. Always be confident with yourself & don't let him or anyone bring you down. It won't be easy at first but you can do it. & in time weather its a month, 6 months, or even possibly a year you'll be a lot better. Just take everyday a step at a time. Only you can help yourself .. But the sooner you end it, sooner you'll be able to let go. “Happiness is like a butterfly: The more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder…” It's all about time but you can do it. I hope this advice helps you out.(:
thanked the writer.
Anonymous
Anonymous commented
Hi, yes it did. I'm in exactly the same situation as you. I don't Noe why I stayed with him for 2 years. I started being unhappy bout 6 months in. We fight all the time and I think I start most of them, but it's like he thinks something is black and I think it's white. I really believe he loves me but he is just so short tempered and apparently I'm ment to tolerate that and change to suit him because he should never have too change for anyone. It's just so hard
Gillian Smith Profile
Gillian Smith answered
You are probably frightened of letting go for good and are looking for things to convince you that you should stay together.
for a relationship to last and be happy you need a lot more than what's on offer just now. The odd sexual encounter and feeling you care just isn't enough to make an unhappy relationship worth staying in.
You should try and be brave enough to break away from this person because it won't get better and you're wasting your life by staying.
It sounds as though it's going to have to be you who ends this relationship as you've told your partner that you want out of it.
He obviously has enough interest in the great sex bit to stay with you but you're not doing each other any great favours by prolonging an unhappy relationship.
You need to get on with life and accept that when you break up with someone, no matter how unhappy you've been you can still miss them for a while. You will get over it eventually. If you can't both work it out then you need to move on.
Aamir Riaz Profile
Aamir Riaz answered
Well, being confused in the matter of relationship will not help you lead a satisfied life. Though you can hardly find any person who is completely satisfied with whatever he or she has.

We can only help you to give guidelines to your thinking and assessing process but still you will have to decide on your own.
Be honest with yourself and answer these questions about you.

1. What do you want in a relationship? Does he have that thing in him to give you that sort of relationship? If not, can anyone else?
2. What was the reason in the first place when you started your relationship with him? Does that reason still exist?
3. What do you want in your relationship, best sex, pampering partner, intelligent man, wealthy man or caring man?

Try to figure out with the answers, best sex is not a big deal; you can have it otherwise as well. Just prioritize your need for a relationship and also assess have you been good to that relationship?
Aimee Rogers Profile
Aimee Rogers answered
This is a very common problem and the main thing that you have to ask yourself is what do you deserve? Many people stay in unhappy relationships because either consciously or unconsciously they believe that they are not worth anything else.

You say that the sex is fantastic but is that all that you are worth? You will find that when you get into a relationship with someone who you are truly happy with, the sex will be just as amazing if not more so.

It is simply unrealistic to base your happiness on your sex life alone. Life is about so much more than that and as hard as it is you really do have to draw a line and allow yourself to move on and be completely happy,rather than allowing yourself small pieces of happiness through sex.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I can so much relate to your issue. I am also in a unhappy relationship. I am very much in Love with this Man but he is a very unhappy person and I can't seem to do anything right in his eyes. So I am trying very hard to take him completely out of my life but it seems like just when I have fully let go, he shows up saying all the right things and that makes things so difficult because I truly do Love this man but do not want to Live this way.
thanked the writer.
Anonymous
Anonymous commented
U know what we have something in common,.. I do Love him so much, but i don't know if he is worth it! I gave many chance that maybe someday he will change! But that someday maybe i am completely broke...

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