Would You Get Involved With Somebody In A Relationship If You Are Not 100% Certain You Are Attracted To Them? Is It Worth Trying And Thinking Positively?


6 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I have been in this place, and I imagine the majority of people have faced the same issue/question at one time or another.  

If the girl has made overtures leading you to believe she is romantically interested in you, you might simply respond in a most honest way by explaining that you would like to get to know her and do some things together, but aren't ready for a relationship.  Sharing things to do will help you understand more of her and when you do, you will better be able to see if there is a future for a romantic relationship.  Feeling alone sometimes increases the chances that we will make a decision not in our own or others' best interests-- and no one wants to be set up for heartbreak and relationship drama.

Have the conversation, and make sure there is mutual understanding about getting to know each other first.  Then enjoy each others' company while taking your time.  It's great to have someone to share your life experiences with--and not everything needs to tun into a romance.  One other thing to mention is that it seems you are noticing the attraction toward something more than friends is stronger on her part right now; you need to be honest in your dealings with this person and not take advantage of her attraction to you-- just like you would want someone else to be with you if the roles were reversed.  She may not take you at your word on this at first, perhaps thinking she will "win you over"--so your actions need to be consistent with your words, and until you're ready (if you are ever ready) to move to the next step with this person, be honorable and consistent as a friend --only.

thanked the writer.
Quentin Sasq
Quentin Sasq commented
You are right, if the roles were reversed and I discovered I was used, I would feel great sadness and anger. I could never forgive myself, I am not that type of person. Thank you once again for your depth; it is not necessarily what I wanted to hear, but it is certainly the most honest action I can take and I will act upon it. I am certainly interested in getting to know her more, maybe she believes she already knows enough about me? Thanks again.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I would get to know them as friends first... Then when you feel 100% certain then act on it. When people are uncertain of their feelings it usually winds up hurting one or the other if not both.... Don't let it pass you by, but don't jump on it either :)
Rinav Gangar Profile
Rinav Gangar answered
Well I would rather stay away from it. The only reason for it is to prevent HEART ACHE. In the end both will be in the pain.

I would rather make myself close to her as a casual friend, Analyze the relationship very well, Confirm myself and then take a firm decision.

Well getting attracted is far more easy, But maintaining this attraction for a lifetime is more difficult. Relationships are difficult to maintain.

Jacquelyn Mathis Profile
I think that being a friend first is the best way to go, and then a companion later, if the friendship works out, this way, neither of you are hurting one another intentionally. Having a good friend first is always best for a relationship, especially if you are thinking about long terms. Hope this helps, good luck to you.
carrie Profile
carrie answered
Get to know her better before you decide if you want a relationship. And don't go out with her just because you are lonely--that's not fair to her or you. But also don't rule out someone just because they are not your type. You might be surprised that you have more than one type. But believe me, I understand lonely. I'm lucky because I have 2 small children to keep me busy plus I just went back to school. So I don't have too much time to dwell on it. Most of the people I meet are 20 years younger than me so I don't think I will be dating any of them...
And you can go out with someone and not get involved in a relationship. Look at it as a fact finding mission. And you could end up friends and then you won't be so lonely. Friends are good. Male or female. Just keep an open mind but pay attention to your feelings.
tinga nih Profile
tinga nih answered
I think what makes you uncertain is that you STILL don't know her yet.. I mean know her more.. I know you are aware that its not all about the looks.. But if you ask me?? Go for it.. TRY.. There's nothing really wrong with trying.. For as you have said you are not 100% certain that you are ATTRACTED.. Meaning you are NOT 100% UNattracted to her too.. The best way to know it is too try.. It so happens that mine was i was sure i wasn't attracted to the guys who courted.. And the guys i like aint interested as well.. Lol haha if i were you??? I have done the move.. Thats one thing i envy with guys the most.. I mean yes some girls do the courting now.. But i still go with the old tradition.. Hehe

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