Am I A Bad Grandmother? I Am At The Age Where I Want To Do, What I Want To Do. I Don't Mind Watching My Grandson A Few Hours If They Want To Go Out, But Everyday No Way! Hes So Cute And I Really Love Him , But I Just Don't Have The Patience!
No you are not. The occasional dinner or movie out is one thing. You've raised your children. It's time for them to raise theirs. It's obviously not because of finances, or they wouldn't have cash to be going out. If they distrust child-care providers, they need to get references and background checks. I have a friend in a similar situation, and she is very unhappy. (2 grand-kids) She is not paid, and feels used up.
You have worked and earned your freedom. Great to look after him a few hours or the odd days but to be tied down after a life time of work is I feel too much to expect. If the Grandfather has no other interests then looking after the child could be a way of giving him company. It is a free choice. Your daughter should accept what help you give gladly and not criticize
Well, if you need agreement, I can agree with you. But if you need approval, something is not right at home and needs to be handled. You need to observe the situation and decide on what is best for all concerned, and that includes yourself. It helps to write everything down on paper and not just working it out in your mind. You can view the situation better when it is out and onto physical paper. At some point, write down on one sheet of paper, all the reasons why you should and on another sheet write down all the reasons you should not. Compare the two lists and you should get an answer or solution. This is the best way to make any major decision. You might love the answer or hate it, but at least you will usually see the truth of it...
I am the Grandmother of 4. I feel exactly the same as you do. I have told my children that I will be happy to help them out in an emergency and would feel hurt if not asked in that situation. I have also told them that I will be thrilled to keep the children for a few hours at a time but not on a regular basis. I raised my children and I expect them to raise their children. I love the grandchildren deeply and would give my last breath to keep them safe but in this case the adults should have the responsibility for their own children. I do have a life and it does not revolve around my children (or theirs) any longer. You go Grandma, have a little fun while "we" still have the energy and health to do it.
I agree with you, that is not your job you have raised your children it is their job to raise their own,you should have the grandchild or children when you want them not when they want you to have them while they are in a pleasure mode, you need to make it clear to them and express your love for the child but just as the parents need a break so do you....the best to you...
No your not a bad grandmother because you don't wont to look after your grandson everyday. You wont to do your own stuff now go and do it before you get any older thats what I'am doing now. I have been there done that I look after 3 of my grandchildren every fornight I use to look after them 24-7 untill the mother took them back now all I wont to do is my stuff and thay don't like that and I look after my eldest son kids aswell so does that make me a bad grandmother aswell I don't think so
