I tried to fix someone else's friendship, they are both girls and I'm scared that if they will be friends again they will just forget about me when I tried to fix it. I need everyone to like me and I need to help everyone! What do I do?


6 Answers

Ty Hibb Profile
Ty Hibb answered

You may have set the wrong goals for yourself. You can not expect everyone to like you. You would be better served if they respected you.  That would be something that you can better handle.

Pepper pot Profile
Pepper pot answered

Like yourself.

Getting others to like you in order to feel good about you, means you are emotionally dependent on them. That means you can be easily manipulated ie say something bad about you and you're down, good and you are up. It also makes you try to control your outsides in order to control your insides. That is a big gamble because people do not like being controlled. 

You are trying to control your friends relationship in order to be liked (people please), but fear them rejecting you if they like each other more than they like you.  It is a gamble, a game you are playing which must be exhausting. Hence, learn to like yourself and then you won't feel the need to control other people's relationships because you will feel secure in yourself.  

Let them work things out on their own, that's obviously the lesson they need to learn, life hands us a few and we're doomed to repeat the same mistakes until we do we learn. At least this way it will be their choice to be friends with eachother and you won't be the "middle man" who gets shot :)

Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

You cannot fix everyone's relationship / friendship / mess that they've gotten themselves into. That's part of THEIR maturing process. You can help steer them in the right direction by asking a few questions, but whatever mess they've managed to get into is their doing.

Not everyone will like you. I'm sure you've run across a few people that you do not like and that's ok. Life is not a popularity contest, though many people treat it as such.

You mess up, you learn something, you try again. That's the beauty of it. Don't try and fix everything so the person or persons involved are spared the pain of messing up. If you never screw up, you're being too careful. We all mess up, we lose our temper, we yell at the people we love.

It's such a wonderful experience to actually see a friendship grow and mature. What you need to aspire to is being the best person you can be. Have confidence in you - that's what people will be drawn to.

Bikergirl Anonymous Profile

Sooo .. I'm confused .. You don't want them to forget what you did for them?  Is that it?  THAT is your driving force for getting involved with someone else's relationship repair? You need recognition and their unwavering gratitude?

Well, not much you can do about that.  Life goes on, and .. If you did this 'good deed' for no other reason but to forever commit them with to a debt of gratitude... Then, in reality, that may prove to be very disappointing.

If, however, you did this out of the 'goodness of your heart' then you should feel satisfied that you did a good thing and leave it at that.

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