How Can I Build Enough Confidence To Approach Girls?

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16 Answers

lakeesha Hennessy Williams Profile
I'd just like to remind you to enjoy the whole experience!

As you get older, you will realize that dating and relationships aren't as terrifying and exciting as they might seem.
If you want to build up the 'swagger' to approach the girl you like, I'd recommend doing the following:

Confidence talking to girls

Pass her notes in class. This will help you suss out the situation without putting your neck on the line. If she's not into you, she won't flirt back.

If she flirts back, this will give you a big confidence boost to make the next move.

Getting the confidence to ask a girl out

It's no secret that girls like guys with a bit of confidence. That cockiness comes naturally to some goes, but for others it has to be worked on. This might sound crazy, but the best thing to do is not think about things too much.

The more you sit about analyzing what you are going to say, and how you want to come across, the more chance there is that you'll fluff your lines.

The best thing to do is try and have a good time. Smiling automatically makes people appear more attractive and confident.

I'd just like to say that I wish you good luck. Unless, of course, you have your eyes on my daughter.

In which case I should warn you that she won't be dating until she's 21 (and not a day younger) because I know what you guys are like!
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
You know what - first of all, be yourself and be proud of it.
Start out with being friends for a while - friends find it easier to communicate.

Start out with small talk - ask her what she is having for lunch (that could be a good confidence builder).

Make the conversation bigger every day.... Take it slow.
Even if she then doesn't end up your girlfriend, you guys will be friends - and from there anything can blossom.
Blurtit Featured Profile
It helps to be feeling good about yourself when you do anything with or around her.
Go down the gym and buy some new clothes, that will help with your confidence as you will be looking better than usual.

Find out what she's interested in and try and work out ways to get conversations about that stuff going. Make it light-hearted, don't try too hard or she will smell the desperation from a mile away. Make her laugh and you're 50% there.
Arsalan Maqbool Profile
Arsalan Maqbool answered
Many boys find it difficult to approach girls they like so it is no big deal.
Try exchanging notes with her and then study with her.
After that, slowly you will gain confidence and when the chance comes just ask her out.
brooke moorman Profile
brooke moorman answered
Just start a normal conversation.

Don't just go to her and ask her out.

Get to know her and let her get comfortable with you and then she may start to like you. Do a little bit of flirting too!
Kelsey Grimmett Profile
Kelsey Grimmett answered
You might want to try talking to some of her friends or to a sibling if they have one, this gets you closer to the person you want to approach.

If that doesn't work, then I would suggest that you try talking to her. This is always a big turn-on to girls because we know it takes a lot of confidence to walk over and have a conversation with us.

I hope this helps you in your search for knowledge of how to approach a girl.
Dee-Jay Hange Profile
Dee-Jay Hange answered
I have this same problem, bro. I'm 24 now. Just go for it. I still struggle with it. The exchanging of notes is a good idea.

No lovey dovey stuff, just ask how are you. What did you do last night. Do you have a study buddy/group?

She might be totally offended (and that would suck).

She also might be a certain kind of religion that does not believe in dating. So the best thing to do is ask questions. You seem like you like her and would like to know her. So I would think questions should not be too hard.

PS Good luck.
Leanna J Profile
Leanna J answered
I know it is hard to approach the people we like, but it can be done. I think the hardest is to approach the person you like when they know you like them (trust me, I know,it happened to me last year).

Anyway, next time you want to go up to her just say to yourself "she's just a human like me, and everyone around me. I can do this" and hopefully it works!
becky mendez Profile
becky mendez answered
Hey, just be yourself - and if that's not good enough for her then that can tell you a lot about her. When people disrespect you and you listen then you start disrespecting you self.

Girls like out going with guys, try that and don't be shy.

Good luck. -Becky
Steven Vakula Profile
Steven Vakula answered
As with everything in life, experience will build the confidence.
Do not worry about what they may think or about yourself as not everyone will like you but you have to take the initiative and don't worry about the outcome or the what-ifs of the encounter.

You just have to have the encounters and be confident in yourself that you're a good guy, and if they don't like you then they probably are not someone you should be concerning yourself with.

In the long-run, it will just make you try to be who you're not!
The people that like you for you are, are the people that you want to be with in the long-term!
Dawn Sutherland Profile
Dawn Sutherland answered
I agree with everyone, you should just be yourself.

If you are really that shy then maybe you should slip her a note and that could be your ice breaker and go from there.  Just remember if this doesn't work out there is more fish in the sea.
I don't know how old you are but I am sure you will do a lot of heart-breaking yourself till you meet the right one.  Hope everything works out for you.
Saya N. Profile
Saya N. answered
Yea I agree with exchanging notes.
Or you should just go over there and talk to her.

But come on, you can't be shy.
I mean you're a boy!

...But then again I'd rather have a boy who cares, than a boy that doesn't.

So, I wish you the best of luck with that special someone.
mike rosa Profile
mike rosa answered
Grow a set and just ask her out. You may regret it later if you don't. And besides your relationship won't last anyway. Why would you sell yourself short while in college?
thanked the writer.
Anthony Parker
Anthony Parker commented
Just to let you know....I'm in high school. So don't criticize me. I already have self-esteem issues I'm working through. And I thank those of you who gave me good advice. I tried the note-passing technique and it worked! Now, all I need to do is ask her out after school. Thanks you guys.
crystal brewer Profile
crystal brewer answered
Try having friends who are girls, then ask your 'girlfriends" what they look for. Then you will know what you need to do.
Isabelle Insanity Profile
For one thing girls aren't all that! And there are plenty of other girls too, so it's natural to be nervous.

Maybe just pretend you're talking to one of your mates and start general conversation, then ask her what she's doing later on and go from there.

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