A lady likes to feel special. She needs to feel that she is the only women in the world for you and that you love and cherish her more than anything else.
If you are wanting to make love with her it will start with her head (I think it is different for women than with men) and if she feels special, relaxed and desired she will respond in kind.
It doesn't matter how well you perform in bed, she loves you for who you are and that part can be worked on together with love and trust.
Just respect her, show her love and romance, maybe take her for a meal, buy her flowers and chocolates, be gentle and tender with her - she can't ask for more than that, after all, she married you.