so, i might meet my online friend this summer. we're planning to run away together once we meet. but I'm so afraid to leave my family. i want to run away with her so badly but i don't know if i have the strength to do it. please give me some advice


9 Answers

Cindy  Lou Profile
Cindy Lou answered

My little sister ran away when I was 19 and she was 14--15. It was the single most horrific thing that had ever happened to my family. It was a torturous nightmare. My mother had a nervous breakdown and had to be hospitalized. My dad was constantly trying to work with police and help them track her down. The police went to her school and to all her friends' houses, where they still lived with their parents, and interviewed them ALL trying to get all, if any,  information on where she might be. They were hoping she had said something to someone that might help them find her.

They were hoping they wouldn't find her dead.

As for me, I did not sleep for two weeks. I almost lost my mind and one night in the middle of the morning at 2am, after a week of no sleep, I went out my front door and began aimlessly walking around in the dark calling her name.

It was so quiet outside, and all you could hear was my voice yelling, "Sandra, Sandraaaaa, where are you?"

She wasn't even the same city any more .

My brother and sister would not leave their homes in case she called. They missed school and work and because of that, they lost their jobs and their college grades suffered.

Young people have NO IDEA WHAT THEY DO TO THEIR FAMILY WHEN THEY RUN AWAY. They do not have the skills TO THINK AHEAD on how they will live or even eat. They THINK THEY HAVE A "PLAN", but it is not a real solid safe plan .

There are NO SOLID SAFE PLANS when you run away. Not only that, once you come back, the police will insist on turning your family over to social services to get help or counseling... IF YOU MAKE IT HOME ALIVE.

While you're gone, the thoughts your family are imagining of what you are going through is more than they can handle. The police will search all family computers and all phone records to find you in hopes they can find you before some psycho does.

There are predators in this world just looking for runaways like you to do awful things to whether you are male or female.

You have no idea what you are getting into. Don't do this and I mean it. You WILL be sorry.

Ancient Hippy Profile
Ancient Hippy answered

That would be a foolish thing to do. You don't really "know" your online friend.

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Bryn Adams
Bryn Adams commented
but i do. we have had video chats, so i know her. I know what she looks like and she isn't some creepy old person attempting to kidnap me.
Ancient Hippy
Ancient Hippy commented
I figured that but you don't really know someone until you live with them. What if it doesn't work out?
Cookie Roma Profile
Cookie Roma answered

For whatever reason, running away will never serve you well in your life. 

Jann Nikka Profile
Jann Nikka answered

10 Runaway Ideas, if you can handle them. Run Bryn Run. 

1.  Homeless Shelter 300 new friends. One sleep, other guards.

2. Labor a Deliver Room, pay close attention to the teen mom's having twin. Double fun. Now you and your baby or babies are homeless. Are you having fun?

3. Jail absolutely no freedom, open restrooms and showers.

4. Spend a day watching people beg on the corner. Money to be made, be careful about getting pulled inside.

5. Eat out the dumpster. Or behind the restaurant or bus stop trash bins.

6. Walk the streets literally for 8 hours. No one wants runaways hanging out in their businesses.

7. Sit in the park 8 hours and try to hold your peers or other til you find a place that will let a homeless people their use restroom. Good luck with that.

8. Beg everyone for money and food. Hopefully they'll open their door.

9. Sleep in a homeless/runaway camp with 200 "ONLINE" they know each other. Remember all restrooms are in bushes. Toilet paper?

10. Don't go off with another man or woman, you might get sold or worse. Who you gonna trust?

11. Best stay home and learn to deal with your family. Seek counseling, there's lots of FREE help for teens.

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Jann Nikka
Jann Nikka commented
Me too. You're green.😊☺
Cindy  Lou
Cindy Lou commented
Excellent answer !! I saw a program where they were showing all the runaways living in Seattle, Washington. This is EXACTLY how they were living.
Jann Nikka
Jann Nikka commented
I think I saw that show as well.
Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

It sounds like you don't have a plan, other than running away. What, pray tell, are you running away from?

Once you met your online friend, what's next? You'll pack a duffle bag, hug your mom / dad / siblings, pretend to go to bed and then vanish?

Where will you go? Where will you stay? How will the two of you support yourselves while "on the run"? What happens if you get homesick and get tired of not having a bed to sleep in? Will your online friend try and convince you to stay on the streets in order to avoid going home? What if you really, really want to go home? What will happen then?

You probably are not going to take my advice, but even I didn't run away and I was brutally beaten by my Mom several times a week. Endured emotional, physical and sexual abuse. Waited until I was 18 and graduated from high school before I jetted out.

If you have problems at home, get help for those problems. Running away will not solve it. You'll just exchange the problems that you're currently having for new ones. In addition, I don't know if anyone else caught this, but when you said you don't have the strength to run away, it kind of says to me that you don't really want to but are being convinced to do this by your online friend.

You really need to think this through before taking any action.

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Jann Nikka
Jann Nikka commented
I was neglected. Left alone a to do anything I wanted to do. No one cared.
Danae Hitch
Danae Hitch commented
When I was twelve, my mom got a job and didn't tell anyone. I waited with my four siblings at home after school alone, for my dad to come home after working a 12 hour shift in the oil fields. We thought he knew where she was. He had no idea.

Some people are better off not being parents since they have no skills at all how to treat people much less train their child before the child is thrust out in the world. I'm sorry you went through this, Jan.
Jann Nikka
Jann Nikka commented
I'm sorry for you too.
I was mom to my 3 younger siblings. I was 5 when I started taking care of them. Some nights she didn't come home and when she did she was drunk, beaten and violent. This lasted until I left at 17 never to return to her home. At 30 I moved 1000 miles away and return only to bury her. Sad
Walt O'Reagun Profile
Walt O'Reagun answered

Do either of you have a job(s) that can support you?

If you're both minors - nobody CAN legally rent to you, so you'll wind up living on the streets. 

You won't be able to get government assistance, because any government employee will first have to return you to your parents.

Bryn Adams Profile
Bryn Adams answered

I've thought about it and I've decided not to do it. Thank you all so much for giving me advice .

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