Anonymous

Can anyone give me tips on dating for someone who wants to start dating? I'm at that point where I want to have a boyfriend so that I can get married and start a family. I'm 23 and never have dated. I'm shy and I don't know what I'm doing. Can anyone give me any advice on what I should do? Anything will help me start dating and get over my shyness of talking to people.

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Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

If you focus on getting yourself comfortable talking to people you don't know, that would help alleviate your shyness.

My suggestion is to do a google search in your city for things you are interested in and join a group / club. That will bring you in touch with people that you don't know but share your same interests. 

If you like books, search your library's website for book clubs. If you play chess, google search and see if there's a group in your city.

When you find a group, smile a lot and say - hey, how's it going? You would already have a shared interest, so you can always ask about that. If someone asks you if you're dating anyone, you can just smile and say you just haven't met the right person yet.

If you get close to some people in the group / club you have joined, ask if they want to go somewhere for coffee. Have a group date - it will take the pressure off you. Observe how other people interact with each other. It can give you clues on what questions they ask others they are interested in and how they visit with one another.

You will gain confidence in doing something with other people which will lead someone to ask you or - or give you confidence to ask someone to go to coffee with you one-on-one. Good luck.

Darik Majoren Profile
Darik Majoren answered

Perhaps speed dating (If that is still a thing). It might get you out just to talk to people with no preconceived ideas or commitments. What about work, can you hang out with friends from work? At 23 you must have friends that will go out with you to just strike up a conversation with other people . . .

It's best if your not looking for marriage . . . Start with looking to communicate with your fellow man/woman. Start there, and try making new friends . . . Love will happen all on it's own . . . You try and force it, and I can guarantee, it will be a tumultuous relationship at best.

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Taylor Taylor
Taylor Taylor commented
Afraid not agreed
Darik Majoren
Darik Majoren commented
You my dear are a victim of circumstance and situation.
I hope the online College courses at least open other paths for you to traverse down.
Any nice guys at church? . . .
Taylor Taylor
Taylor Taylor commented
Not sure I really just work with the little kids and that's it. I talk to parents a lot though but don't go to church there or any groups.
Serena Claire Profile
Serena Claire answered

If you like someone, go tell him. It may difficult. But once you do, maybe he will answer to you.

thanked the writer.
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Serena Claire
Serena Claire commented
No, I mean tell the person that you like. Not strangers.
Taylor Taylor
Taylor Taylor commented
Oh, I really don't have any guy friends. Also never really grew up with them either.
Taylor Taylor
Taylor Taylor commented
I mean I never really hung out with them just hung out with girls because we had a lot in common.

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