Anonymous

What advice would you give to someone who is wanting to start dating? I know I may be a little older than a lot of people asking about this. I wanting to date but have no clue where to start even find someone. I'm super shy and wouldn't normally just go up to someone and start talking to them. I'm not into the dating sites but I have know people to find someone on them. What advice would you give me? 

4 Answers

Corey The Goofyhawk Profile
Corey The Goofyhawk , Epic is limitless, answered

I was in the same boat as you are now. I found my wife at a church get-together. Believe it or not, our entire life together is built off of a coversation of an algebra equation. Since then, we have not shut up, well, I haven't shut up. She stayed the same talkative girl she always was. My point is, you don't necessarily have to look. If you see someone you like, just be honest and be yourself. Best of luck to you.

Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

What will help you is to join a club or do volunteer work which brings you into contact with people that share the same passion as you do. You do this to keep contact with others, so you don't isolate yourself, and two, to keep yourself busy. Don't focus specifically on dating. Spend your time enjoying what you are doing and doing some chit-chat with others.

The more you practice the small talk, the easier it will be to move onto other interests you might have in common that strikes your fancy.

Always be content in your own company as when you are content, you exude confidence not desperation. Ever been around someone that is desperate? I have - and it's not attractive. It reminds me on toddlers that hang onto their mother's ankle as she tries to get away!

Check into your local library. Libraries are a fount of clubs, games, activities as they try to keep people coming back and supporting the library. In my local library, they have a line dancing class they offer during the summer. You don't need a partner in line dancing and the steps can be pretty easy to pick up.

When you find someone you want to date, just be yourself. Always offer to help split the cost if you guys go out to eat or go to the movies. You don't want to come across as stingy with your money. Look for free stuff happening in your town - lots of towns have free music especially in the summer.

I would caution you about online dating. People can pretend to be any type of persona online and then when you meet them in real life, you feel foolish because they are nothing like their profile said they were. 

Hope this helps. Good luck!

Arthur Wright Profile
Arthur Wright , Florida Paralegal with a BS degree in Social-Psychology, answered

You best get over being shy here as the dating world nowadays isn't for the feint of Heart.  So much has changed with the Gay Movement playing a huge part, and society downplaying marriage as a important part of Families nowadays.  

The world is also full of Divorces and Sexual criminals that there really is no good rules anymore other than try and meet someone at a place you trust.  You can also tell by Blurts on here that dating is involving younger people  than in past decades which isn't good but by the time theyre in their teens, they've had more experience than most. So the best advice I could give you is trust your gut as the heart has been known to and does lie.  If your gut tells you something is wrong then get out real fast and don't look back.  Good luck

Megan Fisk Profile
Megan Fisk answered

Be yourself, hang out with the people your interested and see where it goes.  If you're to shy to ask them out, try inviting them and a group of people to do something, get more comfortable with them, and then try.  Asking someone out is never without its risks, just follow your heart x

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