How do I get my gran to accept my girlfriend?


7 Answers

Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

You're 15 and this girl is 14. Your grandmother is afraid of you guys getting too close, becoming sexually active, and whatever else that may follow.

You've hidden your relationship with this girl, essentially lying about this and were caught. Your gran asked about you having sex with this girl - you said no - she didn't believe you as you had lied to her previously. The girl's mum asked you to back off, as she - as an adult, wanted to be respectful of your gran's request.

The thing is - once you've lied to someone you love, it's hard to regain their trust. You must go to your gran, and your mother, if you've lied to her as well, and apologize for your behavior. Sit down, facing each other, knee to knee and take her hand and tell her that you're sorry for lying to her. Tell her that you love her.

You're not doing this so you can date this girl - you're doing this because it's the right thing to do, so they will learn to trust you again. Speak from your heart and tell her how you were feeling when you lied and how you felt you couldn't be honest with you about this.

Tell her that you realize that this was a mistake and that you have learned that lying doesn't solve anything. You need to heal this relationship before trust can be restored. It could be that after a suitable time, she will like this girl and you guys can date - but you have some work to do before that happens. Good luck.

Walt O'Reagun Profile
Walt O'Reagun answered

Quite honestly, based on your post here ... You should focus less on relationships, and more on education.  Probably what your gran is thinking, too.

2 People thanked the writer.
lover boy
lover boy commented
yeah i have been but school has had me been put in trouble for stuff i hadnt even done forcing my parents to move me school but i still havent been moved
lover boy Profile
lover boy answered

whats happened is me and her have went out and broke up 1 time before we have tried again and been in a relationship since the 7th september i have had to keep it secret until three weeks ago when school ratted me out after me and my school had problems. Since then my gran being manipulative has tried to poison me against her and i have been thrown out 4 times due to it staying at my moms due to this my mom has sided with my gran and wants me to break everything off however a week ago my parents had offered to invite my girlfriend on a day trip to liverpool to see a halloween festival (this friday 30th October) that same nite my mom left to go home leavng me with my gran she had ranted about me and my girlfriend calling me a liar and casting me out of the house. Last night (27 October) she had another go at me about her and asked me a very personal question (did i have sex with her) bearing in mind im 15 and my girlfriend's 14/15 i told her i didn't (truth) she callled me a liar so i put my girlfriend on the phone to talk to my gran to prove it things changed dramatically causing my girlfriend's mum to answer the call instead. Eventually causing my gran to lie to her saying me and my girlfriend could go back out when she told her mum we could. Today at 21:36 my gran came to me and forced me to end ALL CONTACT with her saying me and her could never happen again. I have attempted to speak to my girlfriend today and her mother replied with this :

''Tyler this is Lauren's mum. She's ok but I have to respect what your nan wants and lauren isn't allowed to contact you till your nan says it's ok to do so.''

however now with this new information from my grandmother i am now stuck as i cant tell my girlfriend about this as her mum will probably call my gran alerting my gran to knowledge that me and her are still speaking.

3 People thanked the writer.
lover boy
lover boy commented
nah its alright dont apologise i cant speak to her anymore cos im being moved school too
my gran lied to her mum saying we could resume dating when i had moved
lover boy
lover boy commented
theyve never liked my girlfriend but theyve based on looks they havent even had a conversation with her properly
lover boy
lover boy commented
ok thank you :/
Jaimie  JT Profile
Jaimie JT answered

I read some of the other answers so I gather there are more details than I have the attention span to read ... But maybe your girlfriend could make her some cookies or a pie  then ... Grandmas like baked goods and girls that can cook. Or a chicken pot pie .... That will Suss it ! :)

Cookie Roma Profile
Cookie Roma answered

All you have  to do is grow up (hopefully learning grammar along the way) , get a job, get your own place, support yourself, make your own decisions and see whoever you like. 

Call me Z Profile
Call me Z answered

Based on your question, I'd say you have more pressing issues than "Gran" not liking your girlfriend. Better up your brain game young fellow, get your life in order, or the young lady may look to more promising candidates. Good luck.

Sharron Prestcott Profile

Concentrate on your school work, show everyone you can be trusted and that you're growing up as a decent young man.  Honor what has been asked of you regarding this girl and bear in mind you're both under age and if her parents think there's been a sexual relationship you could end up in very serious trouble. '

Her mother has told you she has to abide by what your gran has asked so just wait until you're both a bit older then you can ask again if you can see this girl.  If you do this then her parents and your gran should reconsider the whole relationship between you.

The key to this is to wait as you have been asked, do well in school and don't get into trouble.  If this relationship is a deep feeling between you and this girl it will survive but you've got to work at being a young man this girl's parents feel good about.

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