I have a friend who has recently become very boastful. At first it was subtle and we thought she didn't realise she was doing it, but now she just brings stuff up to brag about for no reason and it's mostly stuff her brother has done, not even her. She even talks about how skinny she is (she's not) in front of our other friend who we both know is insecure about her weight. The worst part is it really brings out the competitive side in me. How do I get her to stop?

Arthur Wright , Florida Paralegal with a BS degree in Social-Psychology, answered

First, you have to understand the problem. She has an inferiority complex here and a lack of self confidence. She wants so bad to be the center of attention that she will do just about anything that will draw attention to her and she knows she has the gift of gab. The best thing here is not to egg or urge her on so best to ignore her and let her realize that others don't want to listen to her at all and don't ask her questions so she can keep going.

Sooner or later she will catch on that she is the problem when no one wants her around which is sad as she may be a pretty good person otherwise but has to learn when to keep her mouth shut and she may even need professional help to overcome her inferiority. Hope this helps a bit

ZombieE Lee answered

You have three options.

1. You steal all of her boyfriends. This will surely make her arrogance go down.

2. You beat her up in front of all of her friends. This will shut her up.

3. You murder her! This always works for me.

PJ Stein answered

She has become insecure. If you are a true friend you could ask her what is going on to bring about such a change.

Jojo A. answered

Think about a person who boasts, like a rooster in a hen house. The rooster wants all the hens to look at him so he struts around and makes noise, saying "look at me I am the best" People who boast say look at me compare yourself to me I'm the best I'm better than anyone else. WHY do they have to do that? Popular people don't boast, they are humble and they make OTHER people feel good about who they are instead of concentrating on themselves. They don't have to boast because they are secure in themselves that they are good people. They are the ones who can do a favor for no thanks, no recognition.

A lesser person would do it only for something in return and for bragging rights so they can feel better about who THEY are, not other people. Know why they do it means you can understand them and their struggles in life. Its sad really they are probably very nice people, they just don't know it, but they want you all to think it so they do that by TELLING you rather than showing you. It is a serious lack of self confidence, probably brought on by feeling less than important in their family growing up. Maybe they have parents or older siblings who belittle them. You don't know their struggle.

Try to get to know them and ask questions, show interest in them, tell them what ever you can find to compliment them, they could probably use a friend to feel better about who they are. Just a thought.

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