Anonymous

The guy I'm dating can be defensive/angry re: money ... or women ... or relationships/marriage ... or people who "want something." It's as though he's afraid of being used. (For context, he's been divorced twice.) Help?

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4 Answers

PJ Stein Profile
PJ Stein answered

I think his attitude might be the cause of those divorces, rather than a product of it. Frankly, I would walk, no run, from that relationship.

Virginia Lou Profile
Virginia Lou answered

Dear Anonymous,

It's heart-breaking, and a personal tragedy...but some people have been hurt so terribly that they can only live in the past, and in their bitterness.       I am so sorry, but the chances that such a person will change, and begin       to respond to YOU personally, and your qualities, are small to none.

It's the heart afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance
It's the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance
It's the one who won't be taken, who can not seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live.

~ The Rose

Aldrich Ames Profile
Aldrich Ames answered

If he's been divorced twice and had to give alimony and child support. I feel pretty bad for him and I think it's sort of reasonable that he's paranoid. But if he's not treating you right ( ie Emotional/Physical Abuse or Distrust) than you should probably leave him.

But hey, it's your life. Do what you want.

Cookie Roma Profile
Cookie Roma answered

Clearly he had trust and self esteem issues  The bad news is, you can't fix him  Then again, the good news is you can't fix him  If he's interested in dealing with his issues and getting help for them you should be supportive  If he's not interested, you should leave  You can't make this better 

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