Anonymous

I broke up with my boyfriend a few years ago. Recently I've been thinking about him a lot. I wanted to reach out to him and see how he's doing but heard that he has a gf of over a yr. Do you think I should let things be or try to reach out to him?

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6 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered

I think you should leave it be. From my experience, my bfs ex who broke up with him years ago always tries to contact my bf still and comes to our house at night and leaves notes on his windshield amd tries to contact him on social media and it just causes fights for the couple who were perfectly happy before the ex came along. An ex is an ex for a reason, that's just my opinion. I guess it depends what kind of person he's like with his girlfriend but as for my relationship I don't talk to my exes and he doesn't talk to his.

Jann Nikka Profile
Jann Nikka answered

As long as it's "How Are You" and you're not trying to start drama or trouble, reach out with a "Hello how are you"? I've done it before but he was not an old bf, just someone I had lost contact with.

Four Palmz Profile
Four Palmz answered

Move on.  He did.  Sorry for being harsh.

Lia Tan Profile
Lia Tan answered

I agree with those who say as long as it's just you checking in and not having any ulterior motives. I don't see any problem if you choose to be friends with your ex, especially since it's been years and hopefully any hard feelings have been healed.

If you're secretly hoping for something a bit more, it's probably not a good idea to unless you are absolutely certain that you truly want to be with him and that he's like the missing piece of your life or whatever. You know sometimes our exes do happen to be the right one for us but we were just with them at the wrong time. But chances are, he's not so it's best to not put your money on that.

Barb Cala Profile
Barb Cala answered

Not sure what the point of doing that is.  You two broke up for a reason, I'm sure.  What has changed that it would work again?  Exes are best left in the past.  Otherwise, you're just limiting your chances for future happiness.

Tom  Jackson Profile
Tom Jackson answered

It's true you broke up for a reason, but some reasons that cause such breakups are not necessarily "bad"---they can be circumstantial rather than personal issues.

It is normal to when you have had a basically good relationship with a person who became important in your life that you look back on that relationship kindly and are genuinely hopeful that he is doing well.

Nothing wrong with that desire on your part.

So if there is a relatively simple, realistic, non-harmful way to find out that is likely to have a good outcome---look into it.

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