Pick your nose while drinking coffee as you drive, If you're lucky, you may sneeze and spray coffee all over your windshield and have an accident.
Its always best to walk down a foggy street blindfolded at night.
I'll loan you my gravity boots !!! Always try out gravity boots when home alone... Do it 😈
I triple dog dare you to buy one-ply toilet paper !!! Let's see ya do that one, eh ?
I want you to get a motel room and have unprotected sex with that crack whore.
You don't need A/C in July in Houston.
Buy expired meat...and invite your neighbors for a barbbque.
Hire a dentist who's dental office is his van... Who also sells belts
Don't pay so much attention to labels .. Tubes of hair cream and toothpaste look a lot alike.
Believe everything on the Internet.
Score your next 'new to you' mattress from the local dump. Funny how people can throw out some perfectly 'good' stuff!
If you read it on the internet, it is true. They can;' but false stuffg there.
WHEN DRIVING ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD, CUT OFF TRAFFIC!
........... Had a similar experience...... Almost killed my husband.......
Sooooo a very young and frazzled first time mother Yin was up all night with a baby who was sick and the doctor just basically told me this.... "it's a virus, take her home and give her Tylenol you stupid 18 year old mother!" Fatigued, worried, frustrated and feeling lower then low from what the doctor told me, needless to say, my brain was not functioning with a full deck of cards. I got her in her infant car seat and headed off to a Jack in the Box to get Mr. Yang and me a drink. Then I realized I could get the drink cheaper if I just crossed the street..... So I merge out of the driveway and Yang says "You are going the wrong way!" The angry feminist in me screamed at him "DON'T tell me what to do!!! You don't even know where I am going!" And he says "NO! YIN you are driving on the wrong side of the road!" I then realized most of the traffic was stopped in all directions as I frantically said "What do I do! What do I do!?!?" And Yang puts his arms up in the air and says "I dunno! I am dead anyways!" so silly me..... I cut off a bus that was plowing towards him and got myself into the parking lot I was originally wanting! When he realized he still had 8 of his 9 lives still left, he looked at me and said "next time you are driving on the wrong side of the road..... Put it in reverse and go back in TO the parking lot please!" LOLOLOLOL!
Soooo lesson learned Happy..... Please don't kill Mr. Happy...... Drive BACKWARDS when you are driving on the wrong side of the road!
Make sure you eat as many carbs as you can stuff into your little mouth. Believe me, it will make you feel full of vim and vigor and your cholesterol will plummet!!
It is perfectly fine to play golf in a thunderstorm. And if the lightning does get a little close, just get under the tallest tree you can find.
smoke crack for several days straight or snort up cocaine for swveral days. Straight and then quit forever?? Lolol good luck