Do you agree that it's not love, if it doesn't hurt?

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PJ Stein Profile
PJ Stein answered

No. Real love shouldn't hurt, at least not on a regular basis. I have been married 18 years and while every now and then we have said something hurtful, we have never gone out of our way to hurt each other. We always feel bad afterwards and sincerely apologize.

Real love isn't about those extreme emotions. It is more quiet then that, and much deeper. It is more like finding a missing piece of you that you didn't even know was missing. I am not saying you never get a giddy feeling when you look at your loved one, because you do. It just isn't the predominate feeling.

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Luke Reine
Luke Reine commented
That's beautiful and really sweet ^^ When I asked the question, I wasn't meaning all the time... Just in hardships, if something terrible happens and you don't feel hurt, then can you really love that person? :3 I though not... Thank you
PJ Stein
PJ Stein commented
I don't think that is true. If you love someone enough you can often go in shock when something bad happens and you just shut down so you don't feel anything. Or what usually happens in my case is I push all the emotion aside and deal with the facts. I tend to go into a hyper focused mode. I deal with the problem at hand. 
 For example, my husband had Bell's Palsy about 1 1/2 years after we got married. It is where half a face slacks and looks like a stroke. We were living nearly 2000 miles from any family. I had no personal support system and had to deal with him and the doctors on my own. I wouldn't allow myself to feel anything. It wouldn't help the situation and could only complicate it.

I did finally let it all out about two days later when I was alone at the laundrymat. But by then I knew it wasn't a stroke, and was Bell's Palsy, and that the prognosis was good for a full recovery, so my "breakdown" was minor. (His recovery was about 99%. His mouth still goes slightly to one side if he opens it all the way.)
Matt Radiance Profile
Matt Radiance answered

I completely agree with all Gator Blu said.

So I disagree about the main thing. If love hurts constantly, that's not love, that's drama,  & I hate dramas, I'll cut it very fast.

Love is joy, peace, unity happiness, smile, calmness, relief, exciting energizing, being one heart & soul, love doesn't hurt at all. Love relieves all the pains away not causing pain by itself.

Sane Mori Profile
Sane Mori answered

We all deal with problems in our own ways. The reference was to a song. *smiles* as said above. If someone I love is hurt, I'm pretty hurt as well. 

Bikergirl Anonymous Profile
Bikergirl Anonymous answered

Hurt comes from disapointment not love .. And there are many varying levels of love .. So are many varying levels of disapointment.

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