What does HOME mean to you?
Since moving into this apartment after ten months of homelessness, I have noticed that for the first time ever, I am not really making it into a home. It is comfortable and convenient, a base of operations. But things like wall hangings, organizing it for beauty and usefulness and just pure delight, those next steps are not happening. So I have been thinking about the meaning of home...and wondering about the experience of others?


16 Answers

Matt Radiance Profile
Matt Radiance answered

Home is where the heart is. That's how it is to me!

Call me Z Profile
Call me Z answered

I define Home as that place of refuge we return to willingly, even anxiously; where our comforts await, where familiarity resides and peace might be found. The hoped-for last destination for all our travels.

"Home, the spot of earth supremely blest, a dearer sweeter spot than all the rest".  -Robert Montgomery

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Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Zee. thank you, another spin from my own and yes I so think my present residence fulfills that...your response is reassuring!
Call me Z
Call me Z commented
Maybe you will find warmth ih this old Chinese Proverb (my head is full of this stuff):

"Hundreds of men can make an encampment, but it takes one woman to make it a home".
Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Oh Zee...that is SO dear...and it does indeed touch on what I mean in this Q.
dragonfly forty-six Profile

Home is a feeling within, for me, because I can be anywhere and I'll always be home.

Maybe it was the way I was raised, things and places were always uncertain. One place one day, moving on to the next, sometimes with only days notice. I learned to keep my home within and take it with me wherever I go.

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Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Ha ha, my moving around comes at this end of my life, sounds good Dear DragonFly, now with your and other answers, I do think my sense of home is prolly shifting within!
Ancient Hippy Profile
Ancient Hippy answered

Home = the place that I find the most secure, relaxing, safest and pleasurable of anywhere else. There's nothing like coming home, kicking my shoes off, wrapping myself in my recliner and having the dog sitting on my lap. I look around and say, "yeah, this is all mine", it's just pure comfort.

Rooster Cogburn Profile
Rooster Cogburn , Rooster Cogburn, answered

I felt about the same way when I bought this old home in 1971. I was restless and signed back up for a second tour and rented it out for the many years I was gone. I eventually married the lady that was my renter after her husband took off and I came back. With her kids and my son, we made it a home as home is where the heart is ! I think that's the secret. If your heart is at home ? Then the rest of you is also and you proceed to truly turn it into a home of life. It's where your heart is the happiest, Virginia. Once your heart is into it, everything else just comes into place. Hope I made some sense to you.

Jann Nikka Profile
Jann Nikka answered

I love my home. It's "Large" at 700 sq feet to me. I give thanks every day for my home. Bedroom has only a twin bed and 1 night stand. No pics 😊.

Living room has a sofa, TV and sofa table. 1 side stand. It's Beautiful. It's my home 🤗.

Decorate when you're ready or not ☺.

Pepper pot Profile
Pepper pot answered

Funny you should say this because this is my third home since moving from my parents when I was younger (in between I have lived with non immediate family at times).

I never felt at home in my first place, I remember the first time going shopping independently and thinking that picking out toilet roll was strange, I could only afford the luxury of quilted texture if it was on sale. I loved the freedom of kicking my shoes off where I liked, or leaving my underwear hung on the floor if I wanted, but I never felt it to be home.

My second place was a flat (apartment), I did love it but I never really settled there. Again I was half hearted in decorating it.

Now I live in a tiny bungalow (that you couldn't swing a cat in), and for the first two and a half years it felt like home, well I felt safe and actually looked forward to returning and adorning my pj's and dressing gown. I still haven't really personalised it though.  Unfortunately,  my drunken neighbour returned and made my life hell for 6 months keeping me awake every night with loud music and drunken shouting, he is an abusive drunk.  After the police were involved (not much use to anyone), he is again, not occupying his property. This now to me doesn't feel like home because he can return anytime and upset my life. This felt the most homely and evidence of this was that I invited friends round.  Maybe I am always hoping that this isn't the end of my life's journey signifying a place I may die in, and that's why it can be home but not feel like it. Home maybe more of a feeling within oneself rather than in a place. I too enjoyed visiting other countries, so maybe as a travelling person you will always have itchy feet.

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Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Thank you Pepper Pot, one (somewhat unexpected) theme in these answers being "Home maybe more of a feeling within oneself"...
Also from your post, my very best wishes for your own feeling of home to settle in a place of more and more nurturing for you...
Pepper pot
Pepper pot commented
I think I will always carry it within myself Virginia. I grew up in the country, and we changed stables often because my uncle moved about alot. I guess my love of riding horses and walking out in woodland made my "home" feel more outside than within four walls.
Didge Doo Profile
Didge Doo answered

Last night I was watching Season 1 of NCIS New Orleans -- the Halloween episode. Agent Brody had recently arrive in the Big Easy after a series of shorter postings and commented that she was trying to find a place to call home. Dwayne Pride told her, "Home isn't a place. It's where you have family."

He wasn't talking about her blood relatives but about the family she could make with the people she cares for, and who care about her.

I thought it was an apt description and, considering your question (which may have been posted while I was watching the show) a wonder of timing.

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Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Ah Dozy...your "wonder of timing"...Carl Jung term 'synchronicity,' prolly...yes I like Dwayne Pride comment, quite a nice theme woven throughout these fine and helpful responses.
Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

Are you feeling as if this place is not a place that you're comfortable in yet? Since you have experienced homelessness, it could be that you might be feeling a little insecure that you've actually found a place where you can live and be at peace.

I've never been homeless, but I have been hopeless. I have lived in places that I considered temporary homes, waiting to find just the right spot.

Are you looking for validation that it's okay to be where you are and it's okay to be secure in what you have today? Have you given yourself permission to feel okay about your situation and that it's okay to finally set down roots? That's how I'm taking this question and hope that I haven't offended you.

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Danae Hitch
Danae Hitch commented
Thanks, Virginia. I know that I felt a real sense of isolation after my step-son died, which led to a bankruptcy and divorce and having to care for a 2 year old on my own. It's been many years since all that happens, and we've endured a lot of changes in our living conditions. I'm finally in a house that I can call home, but it took us a while to believe it was really ours.
Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
omg, Danae!
No wonder you "tuned-in" to what was behind my question...
Danae Hitch
Danae Hitch commented

It could have been us, Virginia, instead of you. There but for the grace of God go I.
Bikergirl Anonymous Profile

“You’re My Home” is an old Billy Joel song, and that is what is engraved
on the inside of his wedding band. The lyrics are “I’ll never be a
stranger, and I’ll never be alone. Wherever we’re together, that’s my

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Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
Oh Bikergirl, what a joy, what a delightful insight...
Bikergirl Anonymous
Thank you, but I can not take credit for it nor it's depth .. have to give praise to good ol' Billy for that one.
Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
For the fun of it I did just look him up...and sure enough, he is coming along in years...age 67 now...go Billy Joel!
Tom  Jackson Profile
Tom Jackson answered

There are various types of ADD---various types have different characteristics and different "requirements" that need some reasonable accommodations.

Sometimes I get in a hurry to get home, and more specifically, to get home and into my upstairs study.

As an adult, I have always had one room that is, for want of a better description, the room that allows me to "center myself" when my "burning brain" needs to "cool off."

It always works.

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SuperFly Original
why are we talking about adhd?
Tom  Jackson
Tom Jackson commented
@SuperFly Original

Virginia and I know a little more about each other from our conversations on here than you probably would.

She would know about my ADHD and immediately understand my answer about home as my "organization station."

Sorry I wasn't more clear in my answer.
SuperFly Original
Yin And Yang Profile
Yin And Yang answered

Virginia, my friend, there are so many ways I wanted to answer this. But what it all boiled down to is there is a difference between a house and a home. A house is a roof over your head. A home is where you live. Now a house can be your home or a part of the house can be your home. Right now, my home is on the bathroom floor. To me it kind of sounds like you are describing a house. You are grateful for your house but you are missing a home. Keep your eyes opened my friend. Your home maybe just waiting for you. :0)

SuperFly Original Profile



What is the difference? Well, by definition:

They are very similar. Home is more personal and nebulous. And less literal. Home can be anywhere someone lives, not just a building.

Home to me is a place I can live comfortably with family. A grounded part of my life.

Megan goodgirl Profile
Megan goodgirl answered

A place where I have a bed to sleep in . I should be thankful I have a home because some don't have homes and they have to sleep on the streets and that's the people that need a home and a bed to sleep in.

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