Anonymous

Why can't I get a boyfriend? I'm outgoing, I try and be nice to everyone, I cheer, have lots of friends, I'm well liked. All my guy friends say I'm pretty, hot, etc. my girl friends say I'm intimidating, I don't get what that means...

7

7 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered

Maybe, maybe.,the boys are scared that you will reject them or they are deep inside really like and just to shy to say.

Tom  Jackson Profile
Tom Jackson answered

Here is the definition of intimidating from 

      http://www.dictionary.com/browse/intimidating

to make timid; fill with fear.

deter from some action by inducing fear

It takes a considerable amount of time for us men (and women) to get to the point where we are confident with what we are.

You sound like you are pretty much a high school boy's dream girl, one he would really enjoy knowing and, frankly, being seen with.

But, without the confidence that we as as good at being men as we think you are at being female, we hesitate because we fear that you will find us wanting and therefore ultimately unworthy.

This is about us, not you.  If we (and the girls also) find you intimidating, it is because we lack sufficient confidence.

Try to be patient.  It will not be this way forever.

Ray Dart Profile
Ray Dart answered

The "Heather Syndrome"

In my teenaged youth there was a girl, Heather. She was stunning, absolutely gorgeous in every way. Beautiful personality too.

She struggled to get boyfriends.

Either people assumed that someone that perfect had to already have a real hunk of a boyfriend, or they assumed that she was just "out of their league".

I met her once in later life. Still gorgeous, with a rather glammy job too, still had no regular feller, probably still for the same reason.

I'm not suggesting that applies to you, I don't know you, but it is an example of the way things sometimes work.

Jann Nikka Profile
Jann Nikka answered

Are you looking in the right places? Or you rejecting those that have less income? Old car? Not super handsome?

Are your looks what you tell the man first. 

4 People thanked the writer.
Cheerleadernumber one
I mean I think I'm looking in the right places, I've only been asked out 3 times and rejected one but it was because we were like best friends and didn't want to ruin that. I'm honestly not all about looks I mean it would be nice but not number one. What do you mean by "Are your looks what you tell the man first"? Sorry
Barb Cala Profile
Barb Cala answered

You just haven't met the right guy for you .. Or you could be just too young or trying too hard.  You sound a bit conceited ... Which isn't as much intimidating as it is just off-putting. 

2 People thanked the writer.
Cheerleadernumber one
First thank you for your input. Second Its true I am kinda young. Third no one even knows I feel like this cuz I'm so embarrassed to ask them that's why I asked the Internet. Fourth I understand everyone has an opinion about someone when they first meet them but I literately only wrote About 4 sentences and ur saying I'm conceited, how can u judge someone on 4 sentences?
Barb Cala
Barb Cala commented
Those 4 sentences are very telling. The attributes you describe are not all that someone is looking for in a relationship. Being pretty and hot and a cheerleader isn't going to impress guys who you would want to end up with anyway. You should more concentrate on someone being interested in you for what's inside .. not outside. You username and your self-description are what I'm basing my opinions on.
Arthur Wright Profile
Arthur Wright , Florida Paralegal with a BS degree in Social-Psychology, answered

Maybe youre just trying to force the whole BF thing to happen so back off a bit and be patient and let things happen when they happen Ever hear of the saying that " A watched pot never boils"??  Same thing here as long as you want things to happen your way, they never will  so go on with your life and forget the boys and see what happens but not everything just happens overnight so you will still have to be patient. Good luck

Michael Poland Profile
Michael Poland answered


Your time is coming.

Don't be sold on the very first one.

Your worth more then that.

It's interesting how the more we concentrate

on other things and let it go the faster it happens.

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