Anonymous

Do I have the right to be upset? My boyfriend of 2 years didn't get me a card or present for my birthday? I don't care about cost. Just the thought of even a simple card.. but nothing.. only a text and call saying happy birthday

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Danae Hitch Profile
Danae Hitch answered

I guess it would depend on if he had done anything more last year as compared to this year. A co-worker had a birthday Wednesday; everyone said Happy Birthday to her all day long. She got a cake and card from the department. Her mom called her at work to wish her Happy birthday. Her boyfriend of four years did absolutely nothing. Not a call or text or card or bakery cake. Zippo.

I would weigh this against the whole of the relationship. If he routinely does nothing, I would talk to him about it and how it makes you feel.  He did call you to wish you well.

You would not believe the difference in how everyone celebrates their birthday / anniversaries.  Some ignore them, some do a card and a kiss, some go all out.

If you have certain expectations, then he needs to know them. Then if he ignores what you have shared, you can weigh this with how everything else in the relationship is going. Only you can determine if this is a deal breaker or not.

PJ Stein Profile
PJ Stein answered

Did he know you were expecting more? Did he do more last year? If so did you say "Thank you"? Is he under a lot of pressure from something else in his life? Is he having a financially hard time right now? As long as you weren't expecting something over the top, you need to talk to him, and calmly and let him know you are disappointed.

Sharron Prestcott Profile

Do you normally get him a present and a card for his birthday? 

It's just a gesture that you care enough to remember that special day and put the effort into choosing something you think the other person would like.  There's pleasure in giving. 

Your boyfriend has been thoughtless and it's not as though he forgot, he sent you a text to say happy birthday.  Sorry but if you stay with him you'll have to get used to his rather selfish ways.  After two years you deserve better than this.

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