Do You Seek Approval From Others Before You Do Anything?

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9 Answers

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Why is that? Why do you feel the need to validate your every thought or action with other people? I don't know you but I'm sure you are a wonderful person. Don't forget who you are. The real you, not the you that you think other people want you to be. Maybe they should be seeking your approval...? Sometimes that is a self-esteem thing. I do understand though. I myself tend to try to make people happy and avoid arguing at all cost, but I never forget who I am. If someone doesn't like my hair color or the dress that I put on my daughter for Easter...well, that's their problem(seriously), not mine. Would you allow someone make a decision for you regarding your christianity? Why then would you allow anyone to decide anything else for you? Being agreeable is one thing hon, but living to please everyone else is just wrong. Don't second guess yourself. Your opinion is just important as anyone else's. You are intelligent as anyone and you are doing fine. And remember....God loves u  ;o)
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martha
martha commented
Thank you for your comments. No, my faith in God is mine alone, and no ne can make that choice for me. There are alot of atheists on this site and though they make me irritated, they do not lessen my faith, actually they help to strengthen it! It is just the every day choices I make that i second guess. I know iti s a self esteem isue, and I never had high self esteem. ANd since my husband died last year, it has gotten even less. God bless you.
Lena JH Profile
Lena JH answered
I used to be just as bad! I'm still pretty bad but now at least I do make my own decisions, even though it bothers me when others feel differently. My whole world seems dismal when everyone in my life isn't pleased with me or if things aren't right. It feels bad right?

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martha
martha commented
Yes indeed and thank you for the understanding. You got it right on the nose. I am able to make up my mind, but then I wonder how everyone else will react or what they will think. If I think even one person doesn't like it , I get all upset and worry about it all day.
nettie Profile
nettie answered
Here on earth the cardinal rule is God first And yourself next anyone or anything else you either chose the order you want them in your life or have them pick a number and stand in line.....hope this helps you and will pray for that gift of encouragement and self reliance from God to help you as well as us all... 
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nettie
nettie commented
No I don't rely on anyone,just to please them,because than I would question myself, Am I pleased with the other persons choice.
martha
martha commented
Yes I agree it is GOd's opinion that matters and no one else esp if it does not agree with GOd's thoughts! It really isn't that as much as it is just the everyday stuff.
Penny Kay
Penny Kay commented
Loved this answer, the wording, the hint of humour, and the powerful compassion.
Penny Kay Profile
Penny Kay answered
No, sometimes I wish that I did, I do spend a lot of time worrying about the consequences of what I have already done, and what people will think of it. I mean I occasionally get foot in mouth disorder, and I am relentless about my desire to be kind, but have unthinkingly hurt others feelings, in my haste.
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Penny Kay
Penny Kay commented
Oh and I definitely admit to Chronic indecisiveness. My family will not go to a fast food restaurant with me. Honestly. I am baffled by choices.
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
I generally ask my fiance, but usually do as I want especially with my hair as it grows back.
suman kumar Profile
suman kumar answered
If the decision I am about to take is a very serious and delicated one I seek advice of my family members. For small issues I do what my heart says
Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered
Thank you. I do this. A LOT! And am just now noticing and trying to figure out why. I believe it is self esteem and the lack of approval from childhood. Now the big question is how do I stop it. In what ways can I begin to start to no do this.
David Mathley Profile
David Mathley answered
No I have a pretty good understanding of what I must do to please myself without offending others and I just do what I think is best.

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